That song It’s Raining Men? It’s a lie. It is definitely not raining men. In fact, the phrase “Man Drought” more accurately describes my New York dating. The vast majority of the time, I’m incredibly happy with the single & fabulous life. And, sometimes, I’m not happy with it. Take last night, for example. The night comes and I feel a little down … no, check that … I feel really pissed off, sad and lonely.
I’m still in LA at the moment so I’m at the hotel. I lay my head on the stack of white pillows on the bed that overlooks the city. And, I think to myself, “why the hell am I here alone?” Yeah, I can already hear you: “Stolie, you’re the one who put yourself on the man diet!” But, really, you know what the man diet is all about? It’s about me letting go of the one thing you’re always supposed to hold on to: Hope.
If I truly had hope, I’d know that some really great guy is somewhere in New York just waiting to meet somebody exactly like me. But, experience tells me otherwise. So far, the choice has been about dating: a Stolie-hating idiot; an alpha-male, arrogant asshole; a whacked-out, panty-sniffing, drunk-dialing Irish Boy; a booty-calling-nowa-ima-gonna-disappear-lika-Houdini Italian guy; *OR* not dating at all. And, honestly, I’d rather not date. Take some time for me. Hence, the Man Diet. But, sometimes I get really pissed off about it; and, sometimes I feel lonely …
{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
stolie, I share your pain. I haven’t had a date in two years. ugh!
Do what I do, though! Never give up. We WILL find them!
It gets better, trust me! Vibes are being sent your way and you’ll run into someone normal before too long…
hi stolie darling,
fret not, we’ve all been there and who knows when our time will come again to be in that “hope-less” state. life is defined by its ups and downs, n’est-ce pas?
for now, consider this: your self-imposed man-diet is like a cleansing fast; purifying your system from all the past pollution and getting ready for someone good to make his way into your life – a little to the left, a little to the right.
all that other junk, that haphazard dating, that ego-stroking, that carnal pleasure, it was empty. sure, it provided a few laughs and some distractions along the way but in reality, it was just not quite cutting it. (this is how i’ve felt about my past, at any rate). and earlier this year, i, too, went on a man-diet and have made a little room for hopefully the one i think is WORTHY to stay on with me, for a little longer than a distraction … in the end, we just all wanna come HOME already.
as mitch said, good vibes being sent your way, stolie. :)
_
~~~Send a beautiful man to Stolie~~~
~~~Send a successful man to Stolie~~~
~~~Most of all, send a man to Stolie who will worship her the way she deserves – like the goddess that she is~~~
(How’s that for some vibes?)
Ah, come on chappies, let’s hold hands and help Stolie break the wickedest spell of all – the dry spell.
I think you’ve got the right attitude though – if it’s a matter of choosing between deadbeats and psychos, and not dating at all, I’d rather be single every time.
Me… I treasure the in-between relationship periods, because it allows me to be a TOTAL slut.
I’m not recommending it for you. But you know, it’s something to think about :-p
Nah, I disagree. I have been on my share of Man Diets. It’s not giving up hope, it’s putting hope on indefinite hold. You know the phrase, “Expect it when you least expect it”? Well, the Man Diet is a self-imposed break from “expecting it.” There’s still a glimmer of hope there. Someday, at the end of the Man Diet, when you decide you’re ready to date again, then there WILL BE an expectation. Hang in there, um, Stolie.
that’s exactly it – once you stop looking for them they come looking for you….
hang in there – there’s someone for everyone and you’ll meet him one day…
tonito bandito: TWO YEARS?!?! Oh, sweetie … if I were a gay man, I’d fly down south right now and sleep with you. Seriously. ;)
mitch: Good point, the vibes worked really well for you; maybe they’ll work for me, too?
miss anon: Life *IS* defined by ups and downs … and, the other night at the hotel was definitely a down. So, thanks for the support.
mamachristy: “How’s that for vibes?” That’s really really really really really sweet. Thanks!
jay: I would **FORCE** you to be my best friend and hang out with me all of the time if I lived in London or you lived in New York. :)
anonymous: “It’s not giving up hope, it’s putting hope on indefinite hold.” I never thought of it that way before. You may have a point …
surly girl: Thanks and I hope you’re right. :)
EVERYONE: Big huge hugs and sloppy wet kisses to each and every one of you. I honestly got a little teary eyed as I read all of your words of encouragement. Blogging, it’s cheaper than therapy. (And, more fun …)
that map looks strangely like the western half of missouri. sorry. no relevence, I know.
Somebody knows their Midwestern geography VERY well. :)