My Top 5 Favorite Celeb Stories
#5. I Stalk Matt Damon. Three years ago in Chicago. Matt Damon is in town for a scheduled interview at a radio station to promote one of his upcoming movies. Using a little ingenuity, Mags, Bro and I finagle our way unto the list of “approved persons” allowed into the building on the day that Matt Damon is there by posing as interns. We stalk the building for hours and, later, while standing directly in front of Matt Damon at the elevator, I try to sound surprised: “Oh. My. God. It’s. Matt. Damon.”
#4. Chasing George Wendt. Long ago, in London, “Norm” from Cheers passes me and my group of Australian friends on the street. None of the Aussies know who he is. I start to explain but he’s slipping away from us. I turn around, break into a sprint and chase after him. When I catch up, I’m winded and sweating like a maniac. I don’t know what to say, so I point and yell, “Noooooooorrrm!” He looks scared & annoyed and he shoos me away.
#3. “Mad Dog” Albright. Last year, at a book signing in Washington, D.C., the organizers’ directions are very clear: WRITE YOUR NAME ON THE POST-IT AS YOU’D LIKE MADAME SECRETARY TO PRINT IT. But, I’ve been waiting hours; I want more than my name. I write my instructions for Albright in neat handwriting, “Stolie,” I want her to write, “you are a worthy successor. Signed, Mad Dog.” A friend snaps a photo of me and Albright at the exact moment that she finishes reading my note. The look on her face? Priceless.
#2. I Stumble onto the Set of Ocean’s 12 and Meet Bernie Mac & Andy Garcia. A year or two ago or so, I’m in Chicago and I’m running late for work. I dash out of my apartment’s front door and land directly unto a movie set. “What the hell is going on?” I ask a nearby police officer. “They’re filming a movie,” he responds although I’ve already gathered that much. I ask him which movie and he tells me, “Ocean’s Twelve.” My mind races. George Clooney, Bernie Mac, Brad Pitt, Matt Damon and Andy Garcia are going to be in my neighborhood?!?! I smile devilishly at the cop, “I’m soooo calling in sick today.”
#1. My Gym Crush on Nate Berkus. (This is my favorite story because I met him immediately before he blew up …) Years ago, in Chicago, my every-other-day gym schedule overlaps with that of an extremely handsome young man. We make eyes. I smile. He smiles back. We make small talk at the water fountain. He’s smooth. He’s charming. And, he has a way of making the ladies swoon. (Little did we know; or, maybe we knew and just didn’t care.) I tell Mags about the new hot guy at the gym and I describe him. She says she has noticed him as well. Much later, my phone rings and it’s Mags. “Turn on your TV. Turn on your TV!!!!” They are re-airing the Oprah show. Apparently, The Hot Guy from the Gym has just become Oprah’s New Favorite Designer.
November 8th, 2005 at 7:51 am
AAAAHHHH Memories :)
November 8th, 2005 at 12:04 pm
Well, those stories beat my “Norm Crosby-Burger King” story by a mile!
November 8th, 2005 at 12:58 pm
When I lived in LA I worked out at the PowerSource Gym in Burbank. I was around quite a few actors, most of them were waiting tables and trying to get commercials. While I was there I met Spice Williams, Mariska Hargitay, and James T. Morris (Deep Cover).
One story I heard about that is pretty funny. The sister of a coworker of mine lived out there with her boyfriend. They used to do stalk celebs. They were out one night and ran across Marcus Chong (Tank from The Matrix). He was out on a date. They followed the couple several blocks saying “Tank”…”Taaaank.”
November 8th, 2005 at 1:33 pm
Oh, yeah, Baby. #3 is may favourite. If you have that piccture POST IT!
November 8th, 2005 at 1:49 pm
I never knew you were ex-Chicago. Have you done a post comparing your time in Chicago to your time in NYC?
I love both cities, so I was just wondering if you and I have the same obsevations (though I’ve never lived in NYC).
November 8th, 2005 at 3:05 pm
the mad dog story is my favorite. the norm story though is funny…I saw some actor in the subway and got all tongue tied. When I opened my mouth to speak I said the stupidest thing ever to him. ugh! I am still so embarrassed!
November 8th, 2005 at 4:54 pm
“Mad Dog.” OMG I would have died laughing.
That is just the best laugh I’ve had in weeks.
November 8th, 2005 at 6:26 pm
mags: We need to make more!! :)
hanuman: You say Norm Crosy at Burger King????
raymond: the Matrix is one of my favority movies.
missbhavens: Good idea! The photo is tucked into the jacket of my copy of Mad Dog’s book. When I fly to my hometown for the holidays, one of the millions of things to do is arrange and ship my books to NYC. Once the shipment arrives in New York and I get my hands on a scanner, I’ll post it. It’s a funny photo!
carlos: Yep. Born and raised in Chi-town! :) I haven’t posted a comparison yet, but I like the idea. Coming soon to a blog near you …
berry: Which celebrity and what did you say?!?!?!
goody: Glad I gave you a laugh. Honestly, laughing is highly underrated; people don’t seem to realize that it’s one of the best things that you could possibly do on earth.
November 9th, 2005 at 9:11 am
OHHHH!! Nate Berkus! I never knew but when I found out I didn’t care. In my fantasy Nate comes over to redo a walk-in closet and well, let’s just say the closet never gets done.
November 10th, 2005 at 8:13 am
Isn’t he yummy??? And you aren’t going to believe this, but he actually looks even BETTER in person when he doesn’t have on all of that orange makeup and blue eyeliner that he wears on TV.
And, he’s reallllly sexy.
I, too, have had many o’ fantasy about him. Such as …
We’re at the gym and I’m leaning over the water fountain to get a sip of water. I feel someone spank me, once, hard on my ass. I get pissed off and turn around to cuss the person out, but then I see that it’s Nate. I smile … and then bend over to get another sip of water.
But, he doesn’t spank me a again. He leans over and whispers into my ear, “you’ve been a naughty girl; you haven’t been to the gym in 5 days.” Here, he places his hand on the side of my waist and whispers into my ear so closely that his lips grace the bottom of my earlobe.
“Meet me in the locker room,” he says. “I’m going show you something.”
November 10th, 2005 at 11:39 pm
WOW. I need a cigerette now.
November 11th, 2005 at 12:19 am
And, I need Nate Berkus. Oh, the things that I would do to that boy … ;)
January 26th, 2008 at 9:47 pm
…and this is why I want to move to LA!
January 27th, 2008 at 8:37 am
Oddly enough, non of the sightings above happened in LA. :)
April 18th, 2009 at 3:57 pm
I love your stories of celeb hunting — especially in Chicago because we don't get that many opportunities but I loved the story of posing as interns and getting access to a building — ingenius