Who’s the Tackiest Couple of 2005?
I’ll preface everything by saying that I don’t usually read Star Magazine. Non, non, non. Pas moi! I have far too much class for that; I binge on People and Us Weekly when I need to nourish my celebrity gossip guilty pleasure. ;-)
Having said that, all of this talk about the MTA strike is depressing me. Therefore, today, we’re going to talk about something on the lighter side of life: tacky celebrity couples. A very brief article buried in the “news” makes mention that Star Magazine polls its readers: Who do you think is the tackiest couple of 2005? According to Star, here are the forerunners:
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes
Boring. My couch has more personality than this couple. I have never been a fan of Tom Cruise and I don’t like most of his movies. Although he is branching out, he typically picks roles that are simply too safe. How uninteresting. And, Katie Holmes is just plain dull.
Paris Hilton & Paris Latsis
Okay, I thought that it was pretty funny that they had the same name. Sure, I can see how that might have annoyed some people, but I really liked refering this couple as Paris Squared when they were together. But, they broke up didn’t they?
Brigitte Nielsen & Flava Flav
I didn’t even know that there were dating. When did this happen? Are they still together? I don’t know enough about this pairing to make a comment. Whatever the story, this couple scores Cool Points just because I love Public Enemy.
Britney Spears and K-Fed
I admit it: I liked the song Hit Me Baby One More Time. Other than that, there isn’t really anything else that I like about Britney’s Music. Fastlad has a hilarious post in which he calls Britney a “minging chav.” K-Fed’s 15 minutes of fame should have been over exactly 14 minutes and 58 seconds ago.
Star Jones and Al Reynolds
Oh, there are so many things that I could say about this couple. If you have not already, do check out their wedding website. I found it via The Superficial. Which reminds me, if you love sordid celebrity stuff, definitely check that site out as well as the Awful Plastic Surgery site.
Star—the magazine, not Jones—says these five couples take the lead. (The last time that I checked, Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes were at the top of the list, but there’s still time to vote!) What do you think? And, out of curiosity, if you wouldn’t vote for either of the couples above, is there a couple that you think should be on list that isn’t?
December 22nd, 2005 at 10:29 am
My vote would have to be for Britney and that scumbag she married. He’s a worthless piece of crap! Was that too harsh?
December 22nd, 2005 at 11:24 am
i’d vote for brit and k-fed. Just, damn. That’s a train, plane, and automobile wreck all rolled into one.
Star and Al had a wedding site? Seriously? Okay, who’s waiting for Star’s turn on Oprah’s “I can’t believe he was gay!” couch? That couple is so wrong. They’re like, Liza and whatshisface, that guy she married…anyway. My $0.02
December 22nd, 2005 at 2:51 pm
I confess: I love Star Magazine. My mom gets it in the Sunday newspaper and saves it for me every week. Of course, now that I read The Superficial – on your suggestion, btw – it’s mostly old news. Still, it is my favorite guilty pleasure.
Baby-Mama-B-Girl and Worthless-Sack-of-Feder-Stink are the tackiest. TomKat are annoying and whatnot, but at least they seem happy. Katie, oh, wait – Kate at least had a decent career before she hooked up with Tom. This will send her in to the stratosphere for her career, but she’s cute enough she might have gotten there anyway.
I could go on and on. I feel quite guilty that I’m t his interested in the private life of celebrities, but I can’t help it. Aren’t they famous because they are talented and interesting? Of course, I’m very interested in your life, Stolie and (except to all your loyal fans) you aren’t famous (yet). Could it be because you are a talented writer and are interesting (not to menion you have a hot body as evidenced by the blue dress)? Perhaps blogs will create the new real life celebrities.
December 22nd, 2005 at 4:32 pm
Out of your list, I’d vote for k-fed and brit queers. Hate em hate em hate em….TomKat was a close second because they also irritate the hell out of me. But at least they seem happy and they’re not trailer park trash like K-fad and B-spears. Grrr….
It makes me think of that song by Harvey Danger- Flagpole Sitta. The line in it about “been around the world and found that only stupid people are breeding”.
Hollywood is such fun to sight-see but I’d hate to live there.
December 22nd, 2005 at 8:09 pm
I say Britney Spears and K-Fed, with Brigitte Nielsen & Flava Flav in a close second.
December 22nd, 2005 at 11:15 pm
Tonito Bandito: I don’t know *anyone* who actually likes K-Fed.
Sid: Okay, now Brit and K-Fed are 2 for 2. :) … And, oh yeah, DO check out that wedding site. It’s something else. At first, I couldn’t stop laughing, but then I started to feel kind of guilty because she really puts herself out there … About the couch, all people of the world should just live their lives openly and honestly and in the way that makes them feel most at ease with themselves. It would eliminate a lot of drama.
MamaChristy: No need to feel quilty about celebrity gossip / news. We all need guilty pleasures! :) … “Baby-Mama-B-Girl and Worthless-Sack-of-Feder-Stink” are now 3 for 3! And, by the way, BIG DRIPPY KISSES to you for the very kind words that you said about me! :)
Darwin: 4 for 4!!!! … I *LOVE* that song. :)
Anhoni Patel: 5 out of 5!!! :)
December 23rd, 2005 at 10:35 am
I’ve never liked Tom Cruise and I really hate it when stars comment on important issues with only their star power as their authority (like TC knows anything about PPD.) And Katie Holmes looks like his daughter. But I guess you can’t blame any of them for being on the list. When you have no talent, you have to make your whole life entertainment to keep making money.
December 26th, 2005 at 10:04 am
Ouch! That was harsh. :)
December 27th, 2005 at 2:38 pm
I agree that Britney and K-Fed are the absolute tackiest. How could they NOT be the tackiest?
They are the coach class tackiest couple.
If you upgrade to first class, then the tackiest couple is without a doubt, Tom and Katie. He’s actually the tackiest, she’s just either greedy or stupid. Not sure which….
Cheers!
December 28th, 2005 at 4:38 am
HILARIOUS!!! I love the “coach” and “business” class comparisons. :)