HALLELUJAH: It’s Raining Mandrops!
I’m a single woman in New York City. New York is possibly one of the worst cities to live if you are a single woman because, supposedly, there are 3 women for every 1 man here. The odds are in their favor. So, NYC men tend to multi-task, multi-date. I’m not used to this phenomenon. I’ve never “dated” more than one person at a time … Until now.
Currently, I am semi-dating 3 boys. I’ve been dating Boy #2 for about a month; the other two boys are newer. If I had my choice, I would devote my entire heart, soul and full attention to Boy #2. But, at the moment, that isn’t an option. (No, he’s not married or otherwise committed.) So, when Hot NYPD Guy asks me for my number, I give it to him. And, when he asks me out, I go out with him. And, when he kisses me at the end of the date, I enjoy it. He is, after all, really hot. The third boy, Mr. Responsible, is a bit older. I don’t know how I feel about him just yet, but so far so good.
Given that this is my first time multi-dating, I’m a bit conflicted. I absolutely adore Boy #2, so dealing with him has been the easiest. I’m totally and completely honest with him: I’m only dating other people because you don’t want to be exclusive, but what I really want is to only date YOU. Things are a bit more tricky with the other two boys. QUESTIONS: (1) What’s the best way to tell Mr. Responsible, I like you as a person but, right now, I’m not sure if I want to date you romantically? (2) What (if anything) do I tell Hot NYPD guy about Boy #2?
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RANDOM FOOTNOTE: Look at the column to your right. No, look up. Yes, there. Under the chicken. In case you haven’t noticed, for your viewing pleasure, I have added a “Shortcut to the Boy Snacks” menu. Now, jumping directly to the Boy Snack of your choice is easier than ever. FunkyBrownChick dot Blogspot dot com: sharing tales from NYC dating life with all of humanity, one Boy Snack at a time …
February 24th, 2006 at 12:22 pm
man, the multi-dating’s a tough scene, i gotta admit. but in this social climate, it seems to be somewhat necessary … albeit much too confusing if you really like ONE person and can’t be with them the way you want to be.
*argh*
the only thing i say NOT to do, is go too far sexually with any of them, if there is more than one in your bed. just asking for trouble. i don’t even agree with kissing more than one person, really. but hey, that’s just me.
if you can, send Mr. Responsible an email – see how he fares to the truth. if he wants to continue hanging, then great. if not, no worries. it’s fairly uncomfortable to hang with someone who likes you more than you like them – you often catch them gazing at you longing from the corner of your eye …
_
February 24th, 2006 at 1:32 pm
I defer to Miss Anon (and anyone else currently in the dating scene) as I’m a bit out of the loop on this one. But I will say this:
Why, oh WHY can’t Boy #2 (btw, can we come up with a new nickname for him since he seems to be hanging around?) see how wonderful you are? What else is he looking for when you are smart, funny and brutally HOT? I will never get these big city men…
February 24th, 2006 at 2:15 pm
Hey hot stuff… because that’s what you are if you are getting away with dating 3 men! Nice. Now I just need that kind of luck.
Personally, I’m a one horse pony. I seek to date 1 person at a time, and would rather put energy in one place instead of scattered around.
Play a little hard to get with Boy # 2. If he knows he can come back to you, he’s going to play the field. Now, I only speak as a guy, but for some reason the dating world is starting to make more sense to me… strange isn’t it?
Take care.
February 24th, 2006 at 2:23 pm
I love your random footnote.
February 24th, 2006 at 2:24 pm
OK, I want one of those drop down menus. Email meeeee.
February 24th, 2006 at 7:10 pm
miss anon: Yeah, I know what you mean. It’s tough; I’m not used to it. :-( And, I’m right there with you on the whole “don’t go too far sexually with any of them.” I have had NEITHER of the boys’ penises / peni in my vajayjay. (I accepted an unforgettable, nude massage from Boy #2 on Valentine’s Day, but that was before Hot NYPD Guy entered the picture.) At any rate, it’s too soon to see where things are going with Mr. Responsible and, until/unless I enter into a committed relationship with Boy #2 or Hot NYPD Guy, the vajayjay gate remains closed to both. [Needless to say, if I *DO* start a relationship with one, the other will get the boot.] :)
MamaChristy: Thanks for the compliments, sweetie!!! :-) We’ll see what happens with Boy #2. I’m not going to stick around waiting for him forever you know. Hence, I’m considering Hot NYPD Guy. (BTW, if Boy #2 sticks around for a longer amount of time, I’ll have to think of a new nickname for him.)
Mitch: YAY!!! I love it when I have an opportunity to get a guy’s perspective on dating. I don’t understand men/boys at all; I always wished I had an older brother who would give me the scoop. But, yeah, I think I know what you mean. With Boy #2, maybe I need to play “hard to get” a little more. Right now, we see and talk to each other A LOT.
Berry: *mwah* I’m glad you like the menu!!! :-) Check your email; I just sent you the HTML code. Let me know if it doesn’t make any sense.
February 24th, 2006 at 8:03 pm
love the drop-down! genius.
And wow on the boysnack front! Well done by you. I don’t know how you should handle any of this, but if you can get your new cop friend to give me the number of the hot redhead cop at my local station, I’d be really greatful, lol.
February 25th, 2006 at 12:19 am
Men in uniforms are hot! :)
February 26th, 2006 at 7:40 am
It’s too early to tell hot NYPD guy anything! Time is the bane of all us impatient people, but hang in there and you’ll figure out what to do.
Oh and having brothers doesn’t make men any easier to figure out. I have three of them and my dating track record is abysmal…
By the way – sorry to have been away for so long, but just wanted to say I was sorry to hear about you losing your job. Sounds like it wasn’t the right one for you – and having the wrong job can be just so… defeating.. sometimes. Kudos to you for being able to call it quits.
Good luck with the job hunt. I’m sure you’ll find something. Keep us posted on how it goes!
February 26th, 2006 at 9:03 am
My thoughts exactly: it’s too early to tell hot NYPD guy anything.
Thanks for the good luck wishes for the jobsearch!! :) I’ll definitely keep everyone posted.