Who’s Hotter: Blonde Men or Brunette Men?

I’m horny. I was going to blog about other things today, but I haven’t had sex in almost six months. So, I really need to talk (and fantasize) about men for a bit. And, if we’re going to talk about men, what better topic could there be than People Magazine’s 2006 Sexiest Man Alive pick? No, they haven’t named the guy yet, but yes I’m pretty sure I know who they’re going to pick. Who is it? Well …

Here’s what I know. People Magazine usually bestows the top SMA award on attractive, 30-something, whitebread, American men — though some SMAs have hailed from Scotland, Australia, and England. Also, the SMA is typically someone who is in the news at the end of the summer / beginning of fall when the SMA issue hits newsstands. So, taking all of this into consideration, I have two words for you: David. Beckham.* He’s 31. British. Hot. And, let us not forget that it’s a World Cup year; he’ll be in the news a lot this summer. But, here’s a question: how the hell could the magazine that wisely honored such deliciously dark-featured men as Denzel Washington, JFK Jr. and George Clooney suddenly “Go Blonde”?

Now, before you all throw your Clairol Ultress 7a Medium Ash Blonde bottles of hair color at me, let’s be clear: I love men. All [gorgeous] men. Hell, I think Paul Walker is a hottie. He’s blonde. [Pictured, but click here to drool over more photos Paulie.] Ditto for Jason Lewis. [Click here to drool over J-babe.] It’s just, as I’ve said before; my preference tends to be the 2 out of 3 guy: Hair. Eyes. Skin — at least 2 out of the 3 should be dark. And, you know what? People Magazine used to agree with me. Peruse the Sexiest Man Alive Vault, and you’ll notice that the top award has only gone to 6 (5 faux, 1 natural) blondes over the past 20 years. That’s not exactly “Going Blonde”, BUT it’s worth noting that the two most recent triumphs mark a back-to-back blonde win; Jude Law won in 2004 and Matthew Mcconaughey won in 2005. So, if/when Becks wins this year, we’ll have a Blond Threepeat on our hands. What ever happened to tall, dark and handsome? Are blondes the new “it” boys?

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** Paul Walker is a fucking god. Sure, it would make more sense to post a photo of David Beckham today. But, I couldn’t do it. I just couldn’t fathom writing a post and about blondes and NOT posting a picture of Paul Walker. It would have felt like I was cheating.


{ 43 comments… read them below or add one }

MamaChristy March 23, 2006 at 1:36 pm

I like to look at the overall package rather than a specific feature to determine sexiness. I used to think Jude Law was so sexy, but then I found out about all the cheating and womanizing and now he isn’t nearly as hot to me. Some blonde men are babes, some need to lay off the peroxide and some aren’t as physically attractive as they are wonderful people to fall in love with…

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El March 23, 2006 at 2:02 pm

I’ve never been a fan of the blonde men. Personally I prefer men with dark hair and light eyes, which is funny since *I* have light hair and dark eyes. I guess opposites do attract.

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stolie March 23, 2006 at 4:05 pm

MamaChristy: I know. I knooooow. :) I need to learn that looks aren’t everything. And, by the way, I agree with you: Jude Law is a bit of a freakshow.

El: Same here. But, I have to admit … Paul Walker and Jason Lewis are doing a damn good PR job for blonde men. :)

Random note: Earlier today, I noticed that News America Now linked to me as a “go to” blog source for info on Paul Walker. How cool is that? :)

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Jay March 23, 2006 at 7:11 pm

In general, I very much prefer guys with dark hair myself, but there are lots of exceptions.

And I think Matthew McConaughey won not because of his hair colour, but because he’s an all-round jaw-dropping crotch-moistening orifice-twitching stiffy-inducing stud.

-ahem-

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stolie March 23, 2006 at 10:24 pm

Oh, Jay, you make me LAUGH!!! :)

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MamaChristy March 23, 2006 at 10:41 pm

Thanks for taking my ribbing so good-naturedly. :) And I think “bit” is an understatement when you are using “Jude Law” and “freakshow” in the same sentence.

p.s. – Sorry to hear that the job thing didn’t work out because of money. For all the crappy things to not work out, you can live with just about anything except not enough money – particularly when you are on your own. Something better is coming your way!

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missbhavens March 24, 2006 at 1:44 am

Who’s Hotter?

Redheads.

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Sid March 24, 2006 at 1:45 am

Man, it’s been so long I don’t even remember the six month point…

I stand with you on Jason Lewis. He is purty.

And Matty McCono..I can’t be bothered to spell it right.

Otherwise, I’m all about the brunettes and redheads!

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goldennib March 24, 2006 at 5:28 am

Funny men are hot. Funny men who are self assured are hot.

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stolie March 24, 2006 at 7:29 am

MamaChristy: No prob. :) And, about the job, I have another interview today so we’ll see how that goes.

missbhavens: REALLY?!?! You’re a fan of redheads? When I was in high school, I went to prom with a redhead. I was crazy about him.

Sid: Yeah, “purty” is the perfect word to describe Jason Lewis. :) Did you see the photos? I was slobbering over myself for days!! :) … And what? ANOTHER vote for redheds?! Wow! I don’t know any male redheads at the moment.

goldennib: Okay. Confession. Confession. When I was younger, I really liked Dwayne Wayne from the show A Different World. He was kind, warm, funny and interesting. And, because of it, I thought he was the hottest guy on the show. Seeeeee? I *do* pick personality over looks. :)

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fastlad March 24, 2006 at 10:51 am

I don’t get the whole Beckham thing but I know some boys who do; I tend to prefer lads who look like they’re not just cute but also terrific good fun – runty East Village types with awesome haircuts and genuine artistic talent (there are a few of them about).

Here’s what cured me of The Lookers: I dated a Swedish supermodel named Daniel in the mid 1990′s. He was, I suppose, what you might call physically magnificent. Looking at him in bed I discovered that there was no way to look at him where he was not completely captivating to the eye.

He bored the pants of me.

Next.

(Six months is too long a hiatus, ps).

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stolie March 24, 2006 at 4:32 pm

Runty, truly artistic East Village types, huh? I’ve heard of their existence. :)

And, you’re right: I soooo need to get over The Lookers. Cognitively, I know that looks fade and it’s what’s on the inside that counts. But, for whatever reason, I still act a fool when I see a gorgeous guy …

(Yeah, I’m bummed about the 6 months, too. It’s not natural.)

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Emily January 26, 2007 at 12:07 pm

Dark haired eyes, preferably with a tan, don’t mind about eye colour just as long as they’ve got that twinkle in em.

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Robyn1 June 21, 2007 at 7:16 am

It’s not about hair colour, peck size, penis size or skin colour. It’s f****** about personality, strength of character, passion, kindness, courage and interesting life pursuits. Most women are shallow and go too much on looks. One thing I’ve learnt is never dismiss a guy simply on looks. Get speaking to a not-so-good looking guy and very often you will find much more under the surface. Remember not so hot or quirky looking men have to get a better personality and have become interesting people. In short they have to work harder, and thus are are more manly. So called gorgeous men are lazy and don’t think they have to try with women, which leads to louzy sex and poor relationships.

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Jade87 July 24, 2007 at 5:05 am

Dark hair, blue/green eyes, not fat but not twiggy either and decent fashion sense. Oh and good personality :P but seriously who notices personality first unless u meet the guy on the phone. And in that case he has to have a sexy voice. Haha im not picky i swear.

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doood January 29, 2008 at 10:31 pm

im blonde hah

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doood January 29, 2008 at 10:32 pm

im a guy w/ blue gray eyes

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funkybrownchick January 30, 2008 at 1:18 am

@ Emily: Yep, the twinkle is a good thing. :)

@ Robyn1: Couldn’t agree with you more that, generally speaking, the hotter the guy is the more lousy sex gets. I disgree that most women are shallow. I don’t think we’re any better or worst than men.

@ Jade87: Sounds yummy.

@ doood: Rock on with your bad self. :)

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tessa March 25, 2008 at 9:01 am

to all of the men there the hottest man to be alive is paul walker he is natural handsom3 and the blonde hair goes with his blue eyes he has the most sexy eyes luvin him

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funkybrownchick March 25, 2008 at 6:36 pm

Tessa, you’re BRILLIANT!!! :-) Paul Walker *is* gorgeous isn’t he?

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sally June 19, 2008 at 8:09 am

I’m starting to realise that blonde men seem to be my thing. They stand out to me more when I walk down the street. Im a brunette so if I want to see brown hair/eyes, I can just look at myself.

Daniel Craig – blonde hair, blue eyes, big(ish)lips…nothing left to say. Shame he’s so arrogant though.

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funkybrownchick June 20, 2008 at 1:34 am

I like 2 out of 3 (eyes, skin, hair) to be brown.

By the way, I can’t remember which one of you said it (scroll up to the right sidebar and do a search on my site if you’d like to find it), but one of you said Daniel Craig had a “million dollar body and a foodstamp face.”

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yeah June 21, 2008 at 9:15 am

BLONDE MEN ARE LIKE GREEK GODS OR PRINCES LOL AND I LIKEY!

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funkybrownchick June 21, 2008 at 10:50 am

But, the Greeks have brown hair, no? :)

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Saa August 15, 2008 at 10:06 pm

When I think of any type of blond hair and/or light eyes I think of a prince

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Twanna // FUNKY BROWN CHICK August 17, 2008 at 8:01 am

Same as the comment above. In fairytales, the princes looked the same. But, in real life, they’re mostly brunettes. :)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Royal_family

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hapalise November 9, 2008 at 8:29 pm

I effing love pretty blond guys with blue or green eyes! Dark hair and blue/green eyed guys can be amazingly gorgeous too though, but the blonds always catch my eyes much faster. I’m half Asian with dark brown hair and eyes but my dad has the poster blond/blue German boy look (well, his hair is white now) so maybe that’s why? =P

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Twanna A. Hines | FUNKYBROWNCHICK.com November 10, 2008 at 11:06 am

I’m typically not a fan of blonde boys but, as with anything, there are exceptions. :)

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Terry (gay man) February 24, 2009 at 7:21 pm

I am a fit young looking 46 yr old gay man in Spain.Nearly everyone here is dark of course and when im single (as now) I like a bit of a variety. I was dark haired going slightly grey and have dyed my hair and tache blond. It seems to have reduced my wrinkles and my dull green colour irises are now a more intense green simply due to the hair colour. But the wierd thing is although I could pull before with no problem,boy have my options gone up. Im not ugly nor a stunner just normal and attractive but not camp.The guys here seem to find blond guys more attractive. I wonder if its the same for straight men with Spanish girls?.

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dua' July 12, 2009 at 10:12 am

BRUNETTE for sure :)

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brunetteG 4 blondeGuy August 13, 2009 at 12:48 am

I am way too attracted to blonde men. I want them all the time.

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yvonne September 27, 2009 at 11:27 am

hi i have a huge preference for blond haired blue eyed men. david mccallum from his man from uncle days was a luscious, sexy hunk of man. he still is very sexy. everyone check out his mfu vids on youtube.com

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dude October 6, 2009 at 9:52 pm

blonde men are just really rare and if you did find them then i would or else the rest is dark haired guys.

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Radek November 7, 2009 at 12:20 pm

blonde men rare? where do you live dude?  japan?

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Celeste December 4, 2009 at 6:19 pm

Now you are in my favorites.

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JJ April 27, 2010 at 10:24 am

my first crush was blond, and i’ve always found blond men attractive, but this could be because where I was from (Asia), everyone has dark brown to black hair… so blond just looks so wild and out of place. ^^

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Emma November 3, 2010 at 9:22 pm

I always say that I have no preference, but for some reason or the other, blonde men are  like eye candy to me. Not all, of course, but I just don’t find the same sophistication in dark haired men.

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Alex November 9, 2010 at 8:19 pm

I think both blonde and brunette guys can be cute. It just depends on the guy. But I’ve always had a thing for blondes.

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Melissa March 26, 2011 at 5:43 am

I like brown hair blonde hair black hair and red hair but my favorite is brunetts and blondes I realy like long hair on guys like Gil Ofraim Hes sexy he has blue eyes and light brown hair and also Brad pitt on legends of the fall yummy so yeah long hair is hot.

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Oliver Read March 26, 2011 at 7:37 pm

 
I’m a 25 year old blond dude and I was curious so i searched via internet whose hotter ” blondes or brunettes”? As i did i found my self here reading your comments. I thought it be interesting to let you gals beware of problem when your a  pretty blond blue eyed guy. Other opposing guys automatically seem to feel infuriating they get jealous and call you gay i get it all the time. Its annoying and impossible to avoid however good looking brunets don”t get this treatment why?
As for girls I go nuts for Italians, Greeks, Lebanese so dark eyes dark hair. totally drawn to them and they seem to be drawn to me. I think opposites may need each-other.

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Miranda Renolds June 12, 2011 at 8:17 pm

In general, I’ve always prefered blonde men to guys with darker complexions. To me, A perfect guy would have blonde hair, blue or green eyes, and maybe tanned skin. Although he may be a little young, I think a perfect example of this would be Mitch Hewer (look him up!).

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Mario September 5, 2011 at 3:10 am

I think that you women that see brunette men as less attractive are closet racists, you just dont think you are. Bruntte men have always been the greatest protectors and strived for equality. Greek gods are brunette men not light skinned blonde bruttish viking looking ediots.

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