Remember me? Yeah, I’m the woman who ordered the red curry special on my way home last night. Remember? I placed my order before the two guys in the suits placed theirs, but you brought them their food first. I asked you when my food was coming and, well, you got a little lippy. I thought the attitude was unnecessary and I wasn’t happy about it. I let you know it. You brought my food. I went home and started eating it. After using my chopsticks to shovel 7 heaps of food into my mouth, I was on to you. My eyes watered. My nose ran. “That fucking bitch poisoned me,” I thought. But, no … you didn’t. You just made my food so spicy that my tongue almost caught fire. Oh, you think you’re funny, huh? Well, pull that shit again and I’ll bitch-slap your ass all the way to the other side of Manhattan …
{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }
Make sure you take me by there when I come for a visit and I will bitch slap her for you! No one better mess with my funky diva!
Bring on the spicy food.
Let us know where you ate and we’ll spread the news and shut them down.
The internet gets to alot of people and I’m sure we can all be extremely creative.
Oooo! The start of a revenge drama. Don’t let us stop you and keep us updated!
Oh, hell to the nawl. I don’t know why people in such precarious, reputation-dependent businesses like the restaurant biz EVER manage to have attitude without fearing for their success. You should spread the word on the internets. I told you about my salon blog experience, no?
You should go back next time and thank her for making your food spicy, and go on a rant about how no one ever does spicy food anymore and how refreshing it is to get spicy food, however unintentional. Let her know that you realised she did it on purpose but make her feel like it completely backfired.
But that sounds like quite an effort, bitch-slapping sounds more satisfying….
I’m all for a good bitch-slapping when the situation calls for it. Which, in this case, I believe it does.
On top of my list right now is the barrista at Starbucks that gave my drink order to the three bimbos standing boob first at the counter without looking at the name on the cups, then made me wait till he got through the next set of orders before filling mine.
I would go with you if I could, Stolie. A good bitch slap should always be accompanied by cheering section. Plus you might need a getaway driver. Just in case.
mmmmmmmmmmm yeah bitch slap, followed by a bitch PLEASEEEEEE!
a) Go back, order food and then do a runner.
b) Go back, get her in a headlock and stuff little red chillies into her mouth.
c) Go back, set it on fire and evade capture.
OOh, b, I like b.
LMAO!!
Sorry for laughing at you and your burnt bits .. but .. but .. well .. you understand!!
Bexxie :o)
Tonito Bandito: Okay. Okay. I’ll take you there, but ONLY so that you can witness the bitch-slapping in person. (I’m never eating there again.)
AWE: I like spicy food, but what she gave me was BEYOND the natural relms of spicy. I couldn’t even taste the food. I could only taste the chillis.
goldennib: Ooooh … don’t tempt me or else I might out the place afterall. :)
Howard: I could have continued the saga for another day, but I opted for a night of drinking, dancing and kissing Marines instead.
Sid: No, I don’t think I heard the one about the salon blog.
Darwin: You’re hilarious! :)
Lola: How funny would that be? We stroll into that Thai place together. I do the bitch-slapping. You do the cheering. It could fun!! :)
ErikWithaK: You can’t have one without the other.
Jay: Um … I choose C. It’s always good to be bold. :)
belledame222: Yeah, it was a hard choice. I only chose “C” because I figured, “if you’re going to go out, go BIG.” :)
Bexxie: When I began eating that food, I honestly wanted to go back there and beat that woman. But, now, I can laugh about it. :) Still, I’m never eating there / giving those people my money again.
Yes, bitch slap that wiman…I mean woman.
(There I go incriminating myself again)
;-)
Whoa! Metaphoric! They just lost a customer. What was the name of place so we can handle them “Boycott Sal’s” style! How you doing?
out them!
Stacy: Wiman?!?!! So it *was* you!!! :)
Berry: I’m doing okay. My tongue has recovered. :)
ET: I’m reeeeaaallly tempted. But, it just seems so evil. :)
See, that’s another illustration of why I HATE PEOPLE. Tell me — is this the place I think it is? You seem very zen about it now, but if you REALLY want to inflict harm, take me! I’m always angry about something. :)
You like? It’s the new zened-out Stolie. Everything in life has a purpose. Yada yada yada.
And, yes, it *IS* the place that you’re thinking about …