I’ll def put that book in my must-check-out list!

AmyD: I think you’re right. I had a conversation with Carcar about this recently. We said exactly what you said — that urge-wait-urge cycle is what reminds us that we’re still living, still growing, still changing. I guess life would be pretty boring if I felt like I’d accomplished everything that I was supposed to accomplish already.

tara: I soooo know what you mean. It’s like I think, “once I’ve settled ___, then my life in New York will REALLY begin.” But, once I’ve got the “___” (whatever that is at the moment), I usually wipe the slate and search for another “___” to attain. Know what I mean?

eddie: You’re just like my sister!!! She always says that my challenge is to live in the present. Thanks for the book recommendation, by the way. I’m gonna check it out!

Momok: I’m right there with you. I supported myself ( … and, not to mention, those who were supposed to support me … ) from a very young age. Total sidenote but, as a result, I have ZERO tolerance for people who are overly dependent and/or not self-sufficient.

Jay: Seeeee … you didn’t say “wet dream” this time and your comment appeared like normal. :)

I know what you mean about finding “adult” stuff hard. I’ve been fending for myself since I was 16. I turned out alrite.. but it is daunting to think that what we do has no end.. you just got to keep doing it over and over, day in and day out..

Ditto Amy and Lala.

THere’s no easy way out of the Waiting Place. Damn, looking back I feel like I’ve been in and out of that hellhole for years now.

In the last year I’ve really commited to changing that. For me it’s a post it that says “Be Here Now,” and reminds me to stop waiting, and enjoy what I’m doing, no matter what it might be, or do something that I enjoy as often as possible.

Have you read “Letters to a Young Poet,” by Rainier Marie Rilke? Highly recommeded.

but i still find that i feel like i’ll only be a complete person after some magic act happens. like after i get a job. after i go to law school. after i find myself in a committed relationship. and then i start to fear that either those things won’t happen or they won’t make me feel any more ‘real.’

Something tells me you don’t find that comforting, though. Ha!

Then I think: isn’t this what life is about? Waiting, while wanting, and wanting something else once we get what we once thought we wanted? Really. It’s a pretty good question when you think about it.

When I start asking myself this question too much, I try to put my focus on what I have that I wouldn’t give up for anything in the world. Or focus on the one thing I KNOW is holding me back, and try to change that. Sometimes one small change can be all you need.

Sorry I can’t be of more help, but at least you aren’t alone. Because really, isn’t THAT at least a little comforting?… :o)