Comments on: It Is My F-cking Business!

By: FUNKY BROWN CHICK

FUNKY BROWN CHICK — Fri, 26 Jan 2007 10:43:01 +0000

Who the hell is Joan? Actually, I take that back. I don’t wanna know.

There’s nothing sillier than unprotected sex. Well, maybe some things are sillier, but I don’t know what those things are.

By: ErrorBoy

ErrorBoy — Fri, 26 Jan 2007 01:28:53 +0000

IMHO multi-dating becomes weird as soon as the nasty has happened more than once… Having on-going ‘sexual relations’ with multiple people who do NOT know about each other is not done (I’m not talking about spouses here, that’s a different story altogether).

This reminds me… As a long overdue response to ‘Joan Unknown’, whom I met in the Summer of ’94…

Sorry I walked away without saying a word. I was simply in shock…
YES, that was a nice kiss, YES, I think you’re very hot, YES, I’m horny as hell, but NO I do not ‘trust you’ enough to have unprotected sex with you on a lawn in Central Park, whether you’re on the pill or not…

Did ya really think I forgot the ‘war stories’ of your sexual escapades with virtual strangers in said park? I always assumed there were condoms… kinky is quite OK, but ignorant is a whole different ballgame…

By: FUNKY BROWN CHICK

FUNKY BROWN CHICK — Wed, 24 Jan 2007 12:53:02 +0000

susan: I sooo don’t think it’s an occupational hazard. I really think it’s the city. I have friends who work in all kinds of sectors — nonprofit, financial, health, etc. — and everyone is saying the same thing.

Bexxie: YAY!!! My spam blocker didn’t block your comment. The adjustment must have worked. :) BTW, glad to hear that you’re happy with AT … and, at the moment, it sounds like his left nut is safe. ;)

By: Bexxie

Bexxie — Wed, 24 Jan 2007 08:47:54 +0000

Since getting to know A.T. I’d hate for him to turn around and tell me he’s also ‘dating’ someone else. I’d chop off his left nut.

:o)

By: susan

susan — Wed, 24 Jan 2007 08:16:09 +0000

I’m a SoCal girl who lived in NYC for two years for the first time right out of college, then recently (about two years ago). in both instances, i agree w/FBC – dating is a commando-sport out there! I was shocked – SHOCKED – at how much sex goes on (stepping out, multiple dating, one-nighters, etc.) my friends (single and married) were engaged in, and i’m from the alledged land of the “swinging singles.” we’d meet for drinks and i’d be all like “WTF???” every week after hearing one ridiculous tryst after another. which proves another point – it’s impossible to keep a secret a secret when you do it – somebody always finds out/gossips/etc. interestingly, the most active friends either wrote or acted in soap operas; maybe it’s an occupational hazard.

personally, dating more than one guy isn’t my style – i’m pretty old school and believe in giving a guy i like my focus and fairness.

By: FUNKY BROWN CHICK

FUNKY BROWN CHICK — Wed, 24 Jan 2007 05:44:07 +0000

REALLY??? :-) But, what if a guy likes you and he specifically asks you if you’re dating other folks. That could complicate things.

By: Mist1

Mist1 — Wed, 24 Jan 2007 05:41:02 +0000

Never date and tell. Never.

By: FUNKY BROWN CHICK

FUNKY BROWN CHICK — Wed, 24 Jan 2007 05:29:29 +0000

Darwin: Exactly! It's all about the timing. Asking too soon *is* stalkerish. But, asking too late can be a bad thing too. Sarah: Oooooh, your "skinnier than me" comment inspired me to write a post about my fatphobia. If not tomorrow, I'll do it the day after. And, I'm not surprised that ATL is like NYC. Both cities have really poor straight women to straight men ratios. Too many of us, too few of them. :) AmyD: Are you KIDDING?!??!!! That guy's an ass. History Chic: Yeah, I think things are different if you're sleeping with the guy. MamaChristy: I'm not sure how the average New Yorker feels about this stuff. Generally speaking, my thoughts are that I'm not gonna sleep with a guy unless we're exclusive. stefanie: Yeah, sex changes everything ... Firefly: Thanks; glad that you like the blog!!! :) And, BTW, some day you'll have to let me know what your other question marks about living in the US are. :-) Nat: Yeah, you bring up a good point ... the need to have courage to tell and/or ask the other person about what's going on with the relationship.

By: Nat

Nat — Wed, 24 Jan 2007 02:51:53 +0000

Omg, I’m going thru some insecurites with my man now.. do you read my mind or what? Anyway, if he’d date sb else I’d definetely like to know.. so have courage to tell me ass! Me, on the other hand, have never dated 2 guys at once and I’d never do it.. First, it sounds just wrong but also: when would I have time for so much? jeez, I don’t even wanna picture that!

By: Firefly

Firefly — Wed, 24 Jan 2007 00:01:48 +0000

this is really interesting, and i’m not being ironic here. one of the reasons why i love your blog fbc, is because it explains many things that confused me while i was in the states. i think people around here (in good ol’ germany) would consider it rather… odd to be multi-dating, but then again, i live in the south where everything’s a little more conservative anyway. granted, there’s a fine line between meeting someone for dinner&drinks (which, nine times out of ten, is totally casual) and going out on a regular basis – but i think if you’ve had a little more physical contact (and that starts with kissing), finding out that the person your seeing is doing the same with someone else is seen as a deal breaker. unless of course it’s clear from the start that it’s just sex&fun anyway, then there’s no problem with meeting other people as the ‘relationship’ is primarly about the physical and not the emotional aspect. but anything in between’s pretty much a no-go here – at least from my experience. thanks for posting, now i can cross out another question mark ;)