I love it when readers email me! In my funky brown inbox, y’all have asked me to write about testicles, online dating DOs and DON’T, the “shocker” (two in the pink … ), vegan sex, guys in thongs, how to know if you should trust a guy you’ve met online and a whole bunch of other stuff. I’ve randomly selected 5 emails. YOU lovely folks get to decide which one gets answered in tomorrow’s post:
EMAIL #1: I LOVE BALLS
From: XXXX
Subject: I Like Your Website
To: funkybrownchick@yahoo.com
Date: Sunday, August 3, 2008, 9:52 PMHi Twanna,
Something you wrote made me want to write to you. You have links to a couple of videos on testicular cancer self-exams and you wrote “I love balls.” I really liked this because it seems like whenever I hear a woman say anything about balls, nuts, testicles, or whatever one wants to call them, it’s a negative comment.
Balls don’t seem to play a real active role in the sex act, I know (it depends on how one does it, of course), they just sort of hang there or get swung around or back and forth, but without them, there would be no sex, and no sexual reproduction.
Please, please, please write more positive stuff about the testicles on your website.
Thanks,
XXXX
EMAIL #2 & 3: After Dating Online for Nearly I Decade, I’ve Learned …
To: Funky Brown Chick
From: XXXX
Date: Wed, Jan 16, 2008 at 6:02 PM
Subject: blog idea – what are your online dating rules?Hi FBC,
Since u’r a old hand (read both FBC and Nerve), could you write about your do’s and dont’s of internet dating. I mean do you go through a long communicardo before meeting etc..? Do you go on instincts or do you have strict rules
XXXX
To: FUNKY BROWN CHICK
From: XXX
Date: Mon, Apr 28, 2008 at 5:07 PM
Subject: dear FBCHi!
I’m not sure you have the time to answer emails from your blog readers, but i decided to send one anyway :P
I’m XXXXXXX and I’ve been reading and commenting on you for a few months now. I’ve got a quick question for you: What do you really feel about meeting people through websites like nerve personals? Isn’t it weird?
I’ve just signed in to [an online dating site], and i immediately thought of you. You’re beautiful, smart and fun. Still, you’re willing to meet people online. I’m almost sure i would be mocked if anyone i know found out i put a profile on a meeting website. But i’m not ugly, i’m young, smart and fun, but i can’t seem to find any dates (let alone a boyfriend). So i’ve decided to act on it. But i wanted your advice as well.
kisses
XXXXXX
Email #4: How to Pick Up Black Chicks
From: XXXXXX
Date: Jan 27, 2008 4:56 PM
Subject: Press Release – New Book – “The White Man’s Guide To Dating Black Women”FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
If you’re a White man interested in dating Black women, this book shows you how to make it happen. Learn how Black women think, what they like and don’t like to see in White men, and where and how to go about meeting them. Find out how to cope with public reaction to interracial couples, learn how to counteract the psychological inhibitions that can hold you back from getting involved and understand why those who oppose interracial relationships feel compelled to think and act the way they do. Find out what works and get involved.
Email #5: Let Me See Your Booty Go … That Thong, Thong, Thong, Thong, Thong!!
Date: Wed, 26 Mar 2008 12:42:57
From: XXXXXX
To: funkybrownchick@yahoo.comHi Twanna,
I stumbled on to your site quite by accident. I find it very entertaining, informative and a bloody good read. Both myself and my partner [redacted] are fans and have added you to our favorites list.
I believe that there are plenty of women who get well turned on by the sight of a “cute thonged up” male bum, butt, buns or whatever you want to call them but wouldn’t admit to it. My [redacted] definitely adores me in mine and buys them for me.
I’ve attached a pic (with [redacted]‘s permission) for you. It would be nice to hear back from you but understand that you might be to busy.
Thank you for reading this and we will check out your site regularly.
All the best, cheers.
XXX (englishman living in XXXXX, XX)
There you have it folks! Now, what say you? Which should be tomorrow’s post? Would you rather hear about testicles or, perhaps, male thongs? BONUS: If I write about thongs, the dude gave me permisson to post the picture he attached to his email!!! Or, should I answer the two women and a bunch of others who’ve asked me to share my thoughts about online dating again? Or, would you rather hear my thoughts about interracial dating and the guy’s tips about picking up brown-skinned chicks. Ready. Set. Click the comments link and post your vote!!
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Photo credit: Sophie in Quebec uploaded the mailbox photo.
{ 25 comments… read them below or add one }
One vote for picking up brown skinned chicks!
I think it will clear up any misconceptions us white skinned boys have about you brown skinned girls…:)
I am casting my vote for how to pick up brown skinned women because I am rather curious to hear your opinion.
As a Black woman, I meet way too many White men who approach me with a preconceived notion of who I should be. Personally, I only have time for guys that share my passion for life, the world and its inhabitants. A guy who sees me as the “Black girl” that needs to be figured out should stay the hell out of my way.
Ciao,
P.S. I don’t ever want to see a guy in a thong, no matter how great his derrière!!!!!!!!!
I’m laughing too hard to vote just yet! I’ll get back to you soon. Lawdy-lord!
Choices, choices, I vote for dating black girls because I know you are to bring on the funny… and truth.
Alicia
http://todaystyle.today.com/
Choices, choices, I vote for dating black girls because I know you are going to bring on the funny… and truth.
Alicia
http://todaystyle.today.com/
I go with the interracial subject, too. Do I see a trend here?
jason
I’ll handle this with all the charm and candor of a white boy from Connecticut:
“Learn how Black women think,”
Electrochemically, I’m guessing, like all humans.
“What they like and don’t like to see in White men,”
Dreadlocks. Seriously, white people: we just don’t look good with these.
Awesome: Bob Marley
Notsome: Adam Duritz
Also, I’m guessing most women don’t like to see a guy trying to get with her for his fetish without at least considering her compatibility as a person first.
“and where and how to go about meeting them.”
Maybe at the signing for this book…? Or, out in the world.
I shouldn’t mock. I live in the most diverse county in America. This might help somebody stuck in Crackertown, USA.
“Find out how to cope with public reaction to interracial couples,”
Fuck ‘em if they got a problem.
“learn how to counteract the psychological inhibitions that can hold you back from getting involved”
This sounds like Jedi training. I’m there! (imagine a lightsaber noise here because I have no onomatopoeia for that)
Oh, and clearly #4 is the only choice, so there’s my vote.
1. dating black girls (I wanna see how much or little the black women are put in a box)
if not…
2. men in thongs (I’d rather not see the guys butt though. I was just interested to know how many people actually like that. I find thongs very feminine and think they have no place near a guy’s ass.)
I vote for the interracial dating. If I get one more “You wanna date a white boy?”, I will smack a bitch in honor of all chocolatey brown girls everywhere.
would love to hear your opinions on “something new”. great blog btw
Oh hell, I’ll be different and vote for Balls. I’ve grown rather attached to mine over the years, so I’m curious to know what other people think about them.
jungle fever for sure
gee…… well….. Balls it is….. rather have them and not need them… than need them and don’t have have them…..
lamesabassman…… in thru the out door… which way is up…
I like to relax and enjoy life, the funniest thing about me is that I am a pasty white minnesotan who has only dated brown women. I ‘ve slept with white women, but I don’t think I can really date them, it has something to do with the fact that most white chicks i have met are cookie cutter “no personality out of the box.”. I find it difficult to hold a conversation with someone who doesn’t have a point of view and thinks a good career choice is having babies. most brown women take a stand and don’t give in without a very convincing argument. its nice to have a yin to my yang. I like my relationships to work a lot like how the constitution of the united states should, balance and compromise.
my vote is for balls.
If that book is by Adam White.
He’s a bigot that hates black men. He goes from forum to forum attacking black men.
You don’t need a manual to pick up black women. If your a man, and she is a woman. Then treat her as such.
That whole basis of a book like that is stating that black women are some different species, and you have to do some kind of special dance to entice them. Its really insulting.
I’d love to see a post on the interracial dating comment. The author seems to think Black Women require a special approach to pickups (as if we are another species of woman altogether). While there are some black women who refuse to date outside their race, there are others who are becoming more comfortable with ID. Besides, I have yet to meet a single black woman who isn’t at least intrigued with mixing things up.
Let’s continue the discussion on men in thongs.
” Men in Thongs” ….. is that a sequel to ” Men in Tights”…. damn that Mel Brooks.
that’s the last time I’ll spring for Wolfgang Puck’s….
lamesabassman…… ” Trust no one….. “
i have had unprotected sex with my boyfriend about 2 weeks ago now. He pulled out before he ejaculated.
My period was due on tuesday 18th November. it has now been 4 days and i am still late and wonder if i am pregnant. i have been feeling dizzy over the past two days and i know that this is a symptom of pregnancy, but i haven’t felt anything else. could i be pregnant?
nice site
I found your post informative and helpful to me in my serious online seeking of special someone.
hello..i had unprotected sex on the 4th day after my periods… i took i-pill in 30hrs… after 15 dazz started verginal bleeding (10-20 drops) for 2-3 hours… plzz suggest me wat cn i do ? when will cm ma next period ??.
how to know the girl is fresh or origin during sex ,
how to know the girl is fresh or origin during sex