Manly Monday: Kill an Olympic Sport
I totally caught Olympic Fever!!! I saw the US men’s swim team competitions on TV, contemplated touching myself every time Jamaican Usain Bolt ran or French Canadian Alexandre Despatie dove, and got hooked on rumors about women’s beach volleyball team member Misty May Treanor’s friendship with Jason Kidd. She has his number trampstamped. Um. Friendship. Okay. Moving right along …
Did you know “tug of war” used to be an Olympic sport? No, really, I’m not shitting you. Once upon a time, people actually got gold medals for using their hands to pull rope. Just like The Tug eventually got yanked off the schedule, watching the Summer Olympics made me think a few other sports should get cut. It’s Manly Monday. So, tell me, if you could choose, which men’s summer sport would you vote off the Olympic island?
BADMINTON
ARCHERY
BMX CYCLING
WEIGHT LIFTING
TABLE TENNIS
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Photo credit: Cute little mauve images appear online at Olympics.org
August 25th, 2008 at 1:05 am
none of those. how about say, “race walk?” handball is a bunch of guys standing around with their hands raised and one guy throwing a hacky-sack. next thing you know, trampoline is going to be an olympic “sport.”
oh wait…
seriously, i wish i had a nickel every time i flipped on the olympics to some random event and my first thought was “there’s no way this is a sport.”
August 25th, 2008 at 10:05 am
with Woman’s softball in limbo….. and BMX is the new flavor at the Games….
what’s next…… discus catching…….
guess archery….. cause …. not too many people need a bow and arrow to catch
breakfast any more….. or do they…..
lamesabassman……. next stop,London.. you want Gatorade with your bangers and mash,Mate….
August 25th, 2008 at 10:18 am
I’m not to found of Speed Walking myself…but out of those sports I would say badminton, leave that to the ladies…
Archery is cool…hard as sh!t…but cool
@Dan-E you leave trampoline out of this! that’s my best shot at gettin a gold medal…well i might have a shot at handball too…
August 25th, 2008 at 11:07 am
maybe one or two of the rowing events with a side order of airpistol
August 25th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
Table tennis is just a fancy way of saying ping-pong. It’s not a sport, it’s really, really not. I don’t care how short their shorts are or how into it they get.
On the opposite side of things, I’m thinking that it may be time for women’s synchronized swimming and/or rhythmic gymnastics to go.
August 25th, 2008 at 5:13 pm
I gotta go with table tennis.
August 25th, 2008 at 5:55 pm
Anything that requires a judge to decide a winner, that includes gymnastics, diving, synchronized swimming, and that damn thing were the horses do all the work by jumping over obstacles.
Thats not sport it’s a hyped up beauty pagent.
August 25th, 2008 at 7:34 pm
Ballroom dancing was once an Olympic sport. True tale.
August 25th, 2008 at 8:24 pm
Table Tennis!
I’m glad I wasn’t the only one contemplating touching myself while watching Usain Bolt!!
August 25th, 2008 at 9:44 pm
For me, it’s synchronized swimming. I don’t know why it just bothers me. I just found out our courier at my job won a gold medal in 1948 for shooting. I didn’t even know what to say about that.
August 25th, 2008 at 11:03 pm
Ballroom Dancing….. Gadzooks….. that kinda like synchronized swimming … but
without the water…….
Thank God for Beach Volleyball ….. the sand… the suits…. Da Gold…. oh… my….
lamesabassman….. London… High Tea…… and ganja, mon… Irie……
August 25th, 2008 at 11:37 pm
@ dan-E: Handball is pretty special, too. I can’t believe I left that off of the chop list.
@ lamesabassman: I think this was the first year for BMX, no?
@ Brandn | Fortyoneacres: Badminton doesn’t freak me out as much at RG.
@ dkzone: The rowing men had HARD chests. I’d keep them because they’re sexy. :)
@ ladimcbeth: You’re funny. :) And, yeah, I agree about BOTH of those women’s sports. RG needs to go!!!
@ Pegs: :)
@ Clnmike: Maybe “beauty pagentry” will be in London 2012. Swim suit competition? Wait, we’ve already got that covered with beach volleyball.
@ Brenz: Are you serious?!?!
@ Phoena: That’s three votes for table tennis! :)
@ Mags: Is it coincidental that the courier / postal dude got a medal for shooting.
August 25th, 2008 at 11:51 pm
yes…. this was the first year for it…… and if memory serves me well…. in the Woman’s Division…. an American came in third…. and Aussies took 1 and 2…
must be all those hills and such Down Under….. come back Cali…. or at least…
Da Bronx……
lamesabassman…… ” kick…. and push…. now… roll…”
August 26th, 2008 at 11:42 am
I’m fine with getting rid of one of the volleyballs — take your pic, beach or indoor! (although I’m willing to keep the beach if the men start going shirtless and wearing speedos…). Table tennis fo’ sho’! And, although I love it, I’ve been wondering what on earth is “rhythmic gymnastics” doing as an Olympic event?
August 26th, 2008 at 12:37 pm
WHAT??!?!?!?! You wanna knock off beach volleyball? Oh, yes, you’re un-American. ;) No, but, seriously, I’m right there with you on the shirtless men. I wanna see that. :)
August 27th, 2008 at 10:15 pm
Rhythmic Gymnastics. No explanation necessary.
August 27th, 2008 at 11:35 pm
gee…. Disco had retire somewhere……
lamesabassman….. ’nuff said…..
August 27th, 2008 at 11:35 pm
Well it’s RECOGNIZED, at any rate. I lack the attention span to see if it was ever a competition.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ballroom_dancing#Elements_of_competition
August 28th, 2008 at 12:32 am
BMX. Man that shite sucks sand. Happened to catch the ‘finals’ last week. The ‘race’ is over in 12 seconds flat, which isn’t bad as far as torture is concerned, but the real problem is that the winner for both finals wasn’t the most skilled biker, but rather the first one who managed not to get knocked down by the dumbest mofo on the track.
August 28th, 2008 at 9:43 am
@ Precina: You’re right. No explanation necessary. I *still* can’t believe the hula hoop and ribbon dance (”RG”) is part of the Olympics. Did you see Al and Matt do it??? Here’s the clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5SYSMQcwlJw. Fast forward to the 3:30 or 4:00 mark.
@ Brenz: Attention spam? What is that? ;)
@ Dunderklompjes: I *SAW* that!!! The dude who fell took out like 1/2 the competitors!!
September 1st, 2008 at 4:20 am
You know, Lady T, you should have touched yourself. Self love is good love! Should be. Just sayin’.
September 1st, 2008 at 9:09 am
Self love IS good love. :)
September 1st, 2008 at 11:04 am
only because it wont leave you….. or stand you up….
lamesabassman……. ” wake me when you’re done,you’re the only one having fun..”
September 23rd, 2008 at 10:14 pm
If you love Asian guys as much as you profess, Ms. Funky Brown, leave table tennis the hell alone!! ;) For us Asian guys over 5′10″ and weighing more than a buck, it’s all we got.
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Well, unless illegal street racing, video games or medical/accounting schooling become Olympic events.
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And if ballroom dancing, BMX and race walk can be Olympic events, I totally wouldn’t be surprised if video games made it.