Twanna A. Hines @ FUNKYBROWNCHICK.com | sex. dating. relationships.

The Secret Sex Bloggers’ Cabal

You can find us in Union Square, near that dingy bar on 17th St with the waitress who always brings the wrong drinks. Spot our little tushes comfortably seated in office cubicles next to yours on the 8th floor of the building on 34th. We have jobs, children, husbands and lovers. We cry when our family members get sick. We question whether we’ll stay in NYC. We write book proposals that we hope & pray will sell. We get frustrated when rifts threaten to tear our community apart. Some of us fear you’d reject, divorce or fire us if you knew what we said (and did!) when we draped our fingers across our laptops — keystroking our truths, living and writing as honestly as we know how.

In the 2009 NYC Sex Bloggers Calendar, we bare all. See faces, fishnet-clad legs, corsets and feather boas. Our group includes a giant 125-pound leggy blonde, a funky brown chick dressed as a sexy Cinderella, a scantily clad superhero and other images that will certainly make you wet, hard, or hard and wet. We range in age and skin tones from warm mahogany sultry 20-somethings to naughty, pale peach 50-somethings. Buy a calendar! It costs $30 (international: €20.77, ₤16.67, ¥3,177.12, etc) — includes shipping & sexy images of pin ups Audacia, Desiree, Diva, Elizabeth, Jamye, Lux, Mariella, Rachel, Riese, Sinclair, Tess and me (Twanna). Or, if you prefer, spend only $10 (international: €6.92, ₤5.50, ¥1,059.04 or etc) to print whatever you want on a day of your choosing. Examples? Buy January 20th and write “Happy Birthday, Twanna! From, ___.” You could buy your blog’s anniversary and write “Read my blog, www.___.blogspot.com. It turns 2 today.” (That’s a helluva advertising bargain!!!) Want a sneak peek? Check out my amateur snapshots of us prepping for the shoot:

The “real” images and a teaser trailer will be available soon. Buy a calendar (or a day) today. Details are online here. If you have questions, don’t be afraid to ask!! C’est tout!! Now, go buy a calendar. Big drippy kisses to the folks who made it possible: photographer Stacie Joy, videographer Audacia Ray, hairstylist Danny from Danny K Style, makeup artist Stormy / Jo Boy (username: mkp2418 email service: yahoo), photographer’s assistant darren Mayhem, stylist / AMAZING knower of all things related to posing & modeling Jezebel Express, and Slipper Room Burlesque Night Club & Cocktail Lounge floor manager / dj Ken “Kenball“. (RANDOMNESS: Stacie kinda sort of accidentally flashed Ken my crotch but, thankfully, he wasn’t looking.)