Manly Monday: How to Buy Men’s Sex Toys
Okay, I thought I’d do something different for this week’s Manly Monday. A bunch of straight women email me privately to ask questions about sex toys, but I’m surprised heterosexual guys rarely ask about them. Guys, I’m not sure if you’re embarrassed or something else is going on. In any case, for dudes who want the information, here’s the quick a dirty about five playthings that work well for dudes. I’m not tagging this post NSFW because I don’t think learning about men’s sexual self pleasure is cause for shame. By the way, HUGE thank you to the sex positive folks at Babeland for partially sponsoring www.funkybrownchick.com. Click the links below to learn more about or purchase the toys.
1. Orbit Ring Vibe. Good for couples — slip the ring over your shaft and and use the vibrator part for your partner. Nice toy for couples who’d like to explore using sex toys together.
2. Maverick or the Blossom Sleeve. Click either link to look at pictures. Basically, penis sleeves are comforting little gloves for your big member downstairs.
3. Fleshlight. Interactive Life Forms makes it, and they have an online forum with questions, answers and other detailed information about the toy. Here’s the link.
4. Blue Beads. Great, manageable starter toy for guys interested in experimenting with the back door.
5. Aneros Prostate Stimulator. “Men,” Babeland explains, “if you want an orgasm like no other, the Aneros Prostate Stimulator can deliver the goods.” It’s designed to stimulate externally and internally; plus, the handle is curved to please you (and/or your partner) as you rock the Aneros back and forth, pressing the space between the anus and balls (or vagina).
December 1st, 2008 at 2:54 am
these devices scare me…
but the OhMiBod Vibrator on the Babeland site is blowing my mind… can I find a review on this site for that? lol!
-tai
December 1st, 2008 at 8:08 am
Fear not. :) See, THAT’S why I wanted to do a Manly Monday on guys’ sex toys. You’re not alone and I think a lot of men feel the exact same way you do. Why not try one out? ;) I picked a couple toys that weren’t expensive so it wouldn’t feel like wasted money if it didn’t work out. (I think the sleeves and beads are less than $20 each.)
By the way, awesome that you mention, “can I find a review”? Personal reviews are coming up soon! :) Not sure how or when, but I’d really like you guys suggest a couple toys you’re interested in learningmore about. Then, I’ll test drive them and write a review on this site. Details coming up soon.
December 1st, 2008 at 8:34 am
I bought a Fleshlight for my ex. He said that it felt great at first, but after awhile, it just got too heavy and became harder to stroke. And then his penis managed to push through to the other side and that just took the fun out of it. (He was 6′5″ with a “proportionally-sized” penis.)
Of course, he was pulling, rather than pushing. Thrusting could help, but I don’t know. All I know is he gave a thumbs-down on the Fleshlight.
December 1st, 2008 at 9:01 am
Even though it’s not google-able, *I* know who you are. ;)
And KUDOS to you for buying your man a sex toy!! After I read He was 6′5″ with a “proportionally-sized” penis I couldn’t read anymore. Le sigh. I met up with a really really tall (6′3″ or 4″ I think) Dutch dude last summer and it was so ridiculously amazing that I still think of him often. Seriously. His penis was beautiful.
December 1st, 2008 at 12:09 pm
Uh. Breaking news – guys don’t really care for sex toys. Sex toys are for women. Except with a few unlucky cripples, we have hands that are perfectly eager to pleasure. Those who do have sex toys for the most part wouldn’t admit to it cuz it probably means they can’t get laid otherwise. Some women can’t come without a good vibrator. Never met a man who coudn’t stroke it. That’s why guys don’t ask about those toys… in my opinion.
December 1st, 2008 at 12:48 pm
Stereotype 1: Sex toys are for women.
Stereotype 2: Male sex toys are for dudes who can’t get laid otherwise.
Hey, hey there Moebius, let’s not judge dudes who like sex toys. :) We’re not talking about plastic fuckers, those real doll lovers. We’re just talking about guys who like to experiment with their own pleasure. ;) Trey Ellis wrote a funny piece about his ex-wife and children finding his pockey p*ssy. Read it here. :)
December 1st, 2008 at 3:08 pm
I tried to get my man interested in toys. He rather like to use them on me and not him. I don’t know why straight men are afraid. They tend to do everything else.
December 1st, 2008 at 4:22 pm
ooola la…Tawanna, thanks for the toy tips/updates. Wish I’d known this when I was married. Isn’t that when your supposed to get your freak on??? My ex was lame and so goes the story…
December 1st, 2008 at 5:36 pm
Is there a Twanna real doll? I might be interested in trying that one hahaha.
December 1st, 2008 at 7:09 pm
@ Mahoganydymond: Have you guys tried a toy for couples, perhaps? That way, he could use it on you while the other part gets used on him? Might be an easy way to ease into it.
@ Mr. Poopy Pants: Tsk, tsk, tsk. ;) Oh, my dear Moebius. Let’s drop the pretenses, shall we? You and I both know you don’t need a “Twanna real doll.” You’ve already (almost) experienced the real thing, my ex boy … wait, what did we agree we’d call you, loverboy? Oh, yeah, that’s right, friend … if memory serves, very well-endowed “friend” Moebius. ;)
December 1st, 2008 at 7:12 pm
Oops, Miko, just grabbed your comment from the spam filter. Apparently it automatically catches the word “freak”??? :) And, for the record, it’s ALWAYS okay to get your freak on — whether single, dating, engaged or married. Everyone has a right to kink.
December 2nd, 2008 at 12:10 am
I LOVE Babeland. Great informative website and wonderful – woman and couple-friendly stores. I just took the man to the one in Brooklyn. As we walked up to the store he said, “Hey, are you sure this is the place? It looks like a baby store.” Sadly, he wasn’t much interested in any of the toys – for men or couples. (I was hoping to encourage him to be a little more playful) But he did offer to buy one of my Xmas presents there.
December 2nd, 2008 at 1:13 am
Dude, WHERE are the guys who are buying / have bought toys??? Any out there reading this post? If so, share your thoughts. :)
December 2nd, 2008 at 1:25 am
kinda unrelated to the post but your filter doesn’t like “freak?” all the other stuff people say here and i can’t say “freak?” whatever.
freak freak freak freak freak freak freak freak freak freak freak! ha! fight the power.
December 2nd, 2008 at 1:28 am
dan-E, this one’s for you:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iVMDyJrAyZE
:)
December 2nd, 2008 at 3:48 pm
Honestly guys…I don’t see what the big deal is… I ,for one, appreciate a man who’s sexual and willing to do whatever to make himself or myself feel pleasure. Isee nothing wrong with a little extra something in bed…
December 2nd, 2008 at 7:47 pm
So, are you getting me a Blossom?
December 3rd, 2008 at 8:36 am
Rachel: DITTO!!!
ErrorBor: Only if I can watch you use it. ;)
December 3rd, 2008 at 10:21 am
Can I ‘watch you back’? (translate back to your favorite second language)
December 4th, 2008 at 1:47 am
yo…. you can get anything you want on Amazon.com….. not….. K, now….. toys…
2 remember Mr. Dangerfield…. ” …. am so glad I was born a guy… ’cause if I didnt get nothin’ for Christmas… at least I had something to play with…….”
you can have mucho fun … if you free you mind….
time is short …. enjoy the rush….. as long as no pain or tears shall pass among
the love shared…. toys are such joys….
lamesabassman…. ” it’s only Rock ‘n’ Roll….. and I like it….. “
December 4th, 2008 at 4:09 am
Greetings: Everyone
Now what is this “stuff” about men not into sex toys? I have had many and I am happily married. In adition to that we have normal sex life. Two of my most favorite are the “fleshlight” and the aneros. Both of which I have now. The fleshlight is an excellent masturbation toy that also helps prevent premature ejaculation. In fact, I am getting ready to order another one with a different sleeve. The aneros is something new to my sexual activities. This toy is designed to be inserted into a man’s anus to massage his prostate to produce an orgasm. I must say when I first used it I received only a mild erection. However, as I continued determined to get that “progasm” expierence the device begin to work as promised. Believed it or not after continued use you notice your prostate craving to be massaged. I answered it’s call one night and was constantly leaking pre-cum. My body felt a different sensation unlike any before hand. I was waking up to a whole new section of sexual fulfillment. I would also like to say that there is nothing homosexual or demeaning about this kind of sexual activity. When I use both toys it only makes me want to please my dearest beloved wife that much more. I think every man should at least have a fleshlight and an aneros for his sexual pleasure. Peace!
December 4th, 2008 at 12:13 pm
#
@ ErrorBoy: Any time. :)
@ lamesabassman: I hadn’t heard that Dangerfield quote. That’s funny.
@ zaam: THANK YOU for speaking up!!! :)
December 6th, 2008 at 9:57 am
@Twanna, December 1st, 2008 at 9:01 am: For the record, I’m 6′3″, and I had fun too ;-)
I’ve never bought any toys, although a cock ring might be a good idea. I have mixed experiences with just aiming for the second round to last longer than the first, or actually masturbating some time prior to having sex… :-)
December 8th, 2008 at 12:29 am
we can suggest anything… even something off this list for you to try?
lmao!
December 8th, 2008 at 4:00 pm
@ Really tall dutch dude: Cock ring? :)
@ Taiwan Brown: Hey, hey, now! :) Nothing off the list; these are toys for dudes.
December 12th, 2008 at 5:28 am
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December 12th, 2008 at 11:24 am
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December 13th, 2008 at 2:26 am
lol!
December 15th, 2008 at 9:34 am
[...] Mr. Poopy Pants a.k.a. Moebius was in New York over the weekend, and we met up for savory quiches, Pinot Grigio and red velvet cupcakes at Sweet Revenge. I think it’s been more than a year since we saw each other. He looks the same, perhaps a little thinner. He’s cute. He knows it. I’d describe him in detail, but that might give his “identity” away to longtime Funky Brown Chick readers and inflate his ego. So, moving right along … In conversation, “Moebius” and I agree on a lot of stuff but we also vehemently disagree. Take orgasms, for example. Question: When two people are in bed together, are both entitled to an orgasm if each desires and is able to have one? I’d say yes. If I’m in bed with a guy and I get him off, I typically want him to get me off too. It’s only fair. Moebius agrees. He says, basically, “When I’m in bed with a woman, I do everything I can to make her come.” Good boy. “But once she comes,” he adds, “my responsibility ends there. I’ve done my job. My work is finished. I’m going to sleep. If she wants another orgasm, that’s her responsibility. That’s what vibrators are for.” What. The Fuck??? If I’m in bed with a guy, I want him to please me as much as I desire to be pleased. And, I’m willing to do the same for him. I get off on getting guys off, and I usually wanna do it more than once. If he’s ready to go again, I’m almost aways good to go. If I’m dating a guy and he wakes me up by cuddling a not-so-subtle daytime erection against my warm body, believe me, it’s my pleasure to oblige. [...]
January 6th, 2009 at 10:06 am
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