Which Contraceptive is Best?
A year ago I told my gynecologist I was allergic to condoms. Her response? “No you’re not.” I didn’t believe her because she’s a Manhattanite who rushes everything — including our visits. But, she did a bunch of tests and I did a bit of research. And, it turns out she’s right. Here’s what’s going on … I almost always use little rubbers to have vaginal sex because I’m not on the pill and I don’t want to get pregnant. But, I apparently I have sensitive skin, um, everywhere. Yes, everywhere. So, if I haven’t had sex in a while, I’ll almost always get irritation and/or a light yeast infection when I “get back on the saddle” for the first time in a long time. It’s not something the guy would ever notice, but I notice because I know my body. After the conversation with my doctor, I experimented with a bunch of different options (natural latex, polyurethane condoms, lambskin, non-spermicidal, etc.). Some actually work pretty well and/or only result in a tad bit of irritation. Less irritation = better sex.
“People would rather suffer in silence,” Dr Christian Jessen tells us via TV, “than get these things treated and that’s ridiculous in this day and age.” I didn’t have anything to “treat” but, before I actually spoke to my doctor about it, I had mildly annoying irritation in my hooha that I kept private. Having a conversation with her (my doctor, not my vagina), helped that out a bunch. So, it turns out there isn’t a one “greatest” contraceptive out there, it’s more about finding out what works best for your body. If you’re sticking with condoms (pun intended), here’s a cute video to show you how to put them on correctly. Any other condom lovers out there? Which birth control methods, if any, do you prefer?
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Related: Sex without a condom
February 25th, 2009 at 9:38 am
lol @ pun intended lol…
February 25th, 2009 at 9:44 am
I used to have a reaction to condoms too–sort of an itching later followed by soreness. It wasn’t just after the first time in a while, it was every time. I found that this went away when I switched to a different brand (Durex) which didn’t have tons of spermicide. So I would agree it is well worth trying different brands.
As far as what contraceptive is best, I think it depends on both the person and the relationship. For instance, in some relationships sterilization will be an option, while in less serious relationships it probably won’t come up. There’s also the disease-protection aspect of the condom which should be a consideration more often than it is (I read recently that STDs are increasing among middle-aged women). The condom may not be completely effective in this regard, but it’s more effective than any of the alternatives.
As for what contraceptive is best for me, it’s probably the condom unless sterilization becomes an option. The pill kills my sex drive and changes how I smell; both of these things make me feel less like myself. Plus I worry about hormones leaching into the water supply.
We’re a lot better off than we were 100 years ago, but it still seems like none of the contraceptives are all that nice.
February 25th, 2009 at 11:15 am
i loved the nuvaring for its ease and convenience. i have a horrible memory. that doesn’t work so well with the pill. plus the hormones messed with my, uh “desire levels.” once i stopped, my sex drive came back — despite life circumstances that should have killed it (breakup, move, work overload).
now i’m using condoms for STD prevention. but i want a no-pregnancy backup. i’m torn between getting an IUD or gettin’ fixed. i do not want kids, but i’m not quite ready for the finality of tubal ligation. an IUD seems like it’s just prolonging the inevitable though. in the meantime, i’m all about rubbers and polyurethanes. two birds with one stone and what-not.
February 25th, 2009 at 11:25 am
Hi t. I also don’t want kids. I just don’t want to be the one to have the surgery, since it’s a more serious operation for a woman than a man. I keep hoping that they’ll come up with a less invasive alternative.
February 25th, 2009 at 12:03 pm
yeah…. I know this a stretch …. try holding hands…. cuddle…. watch DVD’s….
play video games….. go to a ball game….. double date….. go out to dinner….
lamesabassman….. and there’s always Plan B….. just dive in….
February 25th, 2009 at 12:10 pm
but,seriously, folks… with all the bad things out there that can make the rest of your life suck…. the one thing that you can do is have you and your partner get
get tested for every and any thing that’s out there…. then have all the fun ya’ll
want….. just with each other….. that means … no DH’s …. at all….
lamesabassman…. sometimes… one must go backwards to go forward….
February 25th, 2009 at 1:05 pm
*looks at the above comment*
Uh-huh. Anyway, I prefer condoms on the whole, though I do better with non-latex condoms. I don’t want to use the pill because, well, I’m a bit weary of the seemingly strong connection between that and certain types of cancer. More than that, women in my family have had bad experiences with synthetic hormones and the like so I’m staying away from the pill. Better safe than very sorry when I’m middle-aged.
February 25th, 2009 at 4:08 pm
I like the Rhythm Method. Unfortunately I lack any rhythm whatsoever. So I just pray a lot.
February 25th, 2009 at 6:32 pm
which is the best? umm, my face seems to work.
but seriously folks…
February 26th, 2009 at 1:50 am
Hey very nice blog!! Man .. Beautiful .. Amazing .. I will bookmark your blog and take the feeds also…
February 26th, 2009 at 2:23 am
was thinking ” hand to mouth ” but since the last blog ” spit or swallow ” I didn’t
want to lose me hang out card here….. but since some are allergic to the latex in
the condoms…. or the creams….. and lambskin only works if both parties have
passed all the required tests and can hang…… yeah, dan-E, this a brave new
world out here….. and in this world, there a lot of things out here that ” the
wonder drugs ” cant cure or handle……
lamesabassman……… boy howdy, I miss the good old days…when all you had to worry about was the clap or crabs…..
February 26th, 2009 at 6:37 am
I hate condoms. Always have. But there is no option for protection against certain infection. As for sex with a partner that hopefully doesn’t want any infections either, meaning he’s not out there, IUD. The pill is not an option because messing with hormones is not a good thing. I don’t care what they say. So I use an IUD w/o hormones until I can get those tubes ripped out and burned in sacrifice to the gods. I wish I could have had that done at 18.
February 26th, 2009 at 9:38 am
I totally get the vaginal irritation for condoms too and was certain I was allergic to latex in my lady bits. Non-spermicide treated and a lot of lube seem to mitigate that a bit.
I’ve been using NuvaRing for about six years now and LOVE it. No hormone interference, minimal fuss, and it’s always a nice sign when the guy asks, “Uh, what is that in there?” Makes me feel like he’s paying attention. Or like a box of Cracker Jacks (”Surprise Inside!”).
February 26th, 2009 at 8:24 pm
Ummm…guys, the Nuvaring is chock full of hormones. That’s the whole point. When the ring is warmed it releases them into your body. That’s why they ship it to you in that cute l’il styrofoam cooler with ice packs and pictures of penguins all over it.
BUT, what the Nuvaring hormones DON’T do (and thank god, because it’s what makes it my #1 contraceptive choice, hands down) is go through your tummy. I took pills for years and suffered immeasurably. Vicious morning sickness every month for 4 days. For years. Vomiting my brains out. Torture.
Nuvaring baby, ALL the way.
February 26th, 2009 at 11:03 pm
[...] Нοw to Рut on a Condom | Twanna R… [...]
February 27th, 2009 at 10:07 pm
Well let me tell you….
I dated this chick…and switched my condoms, because she had some already.
They were Trojans with spermicidal lubricant. Turns out the spermicide was too strong for me. I started having this burning sensation while takin a wiz and …..saw some puss….=(
Needless to say I was mortified. Did this chick slip some kryptonite on my rod of steel?!…..I was upset. But i talked to my doctor and switched back to the plain lubed trojans and everything was cool after 2 very nervewracking weeks.
February 28th, 2009 at 9:31 am
I am glad I wasn’t the only one who went to talk to my doctor about it. I found out 10 years ago that condoms would make me itch and raw down there. So with the lamb skin it is a mild itch that I can use something to help ease it away.
March 3rd, 2009 at 4:18 pm
wonder if i would be cervix taping material
March 4th, 2009 at 2:27 pm
My #1 contraceptive is a thin latex condom. You can find them in almost any brand, trojan, mangum,lifestyles. I once had a partner who used magnum xls and I felt like I was peeing latex afterwards. Not to mention the irritation. I switched him to thin condoms and we both enjoyed it a lot more. Since then I started carrying my own thin condoms and guys really enjoy it and they notice a difference as well. And I have never experienced them tearing either. Works for me :)
March 6th, 2009 at 8:13 am
[...] about sex, dating and relationships. My recent posts cover topics like to breed or not to breed, birth control and recommendations for top-selling dating books (including Steve Harvey’s Act Like a Lady, [...]
March 13th, 2009 at 2:43 pm
no mention has been made of faulty faux-fake contraceptives being sold as originals that lead to unwanted parenthood/terminations. just thought i’d bring that up because it is just as important to get authentic protection as it is to be actively participating in safe sex.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41nog6O0U6Q
April 1st, 2009 at 6:12 am
Diflucan (fluconazole) for Vaginal Yeast Infection: So much better than the creams. Worked very well. I had very mild side effects. Cleared symptoms very quickly.
April 3rd, 2009 at 4:51 pm
I have to admit I've never given it any real thought – you just buy a condom (or a whole family pack, if necessary) when you need one, even if it's in the middle of the night. But, since you brought it up, what brand do you prefer?
On a not entirely unrelated note: looking forward to going back to NYC some time btw – thinking of planning another trip upcoming fall.
April 12th, 2009 at 2:36 pm
One of the most effective birth controls is Tubal Ligation, however, it is meant for women who no longer want to have kids permanently. This procedure is not 100% reversible and it does not protect you against STDs.