Are Married Men More Attractive?
“youre no one but a slut who loves to fuck her husband and get pregnant and talk about useless stuff so youre a free rider with nothing better to do in life and you dont work god you suck.” Dooce (Heather B. Armstrong) is funny. Like, really funny. The “youre no one but a slut” quote is from a piece of hate mail sent her way. Call it zen or whatever, but I I’m 100% convinced of this: People want others to feel the way they feel inside. Happy people want others to be happy, and they do things to show that. The “youre no one but a slut” comment-leaver (YNOBASC-L) claims to think Heather’s a “free rider” and “slut” who talks about “useless” stuff … Yet, get this, YNOBASC-L takes time out of his/her day to not only READ dooce, s/he actually expends energy to WRITE to and about Heather too??? Um, yeah, okay. That totally sounds like an unhappy little hater.
I thought Heather’s response to YNOBASC-L’s comment was AWESOME because she didn’t cut her down. She wrote: “[A] slut who loves to fuck her husband? Is this a new brand of slut that I don’t know about? The husband-fuckers? Women who love to go around screwing the men they’re committed to? Because I thought those people were called wives.” Love it. And, I add this … Women who fuck committed men have another name as well: mistresses.
I don’t do married dick. That said, I am fully aware of several single (and married) women who’ve slept with guys who were other women’s husbands. On both sides of that equation — the dude with the ring and the woman on the mattress who isn’t his wife — I think part of the allure is the “forbidden fruit” factor. Very few things are as attractive as the thing you’re not supposed to have, right? I’ve even had married me tell me women wouldn’t give them the time of day when they were single but, now that they’re married, [and this is a quote] “my wedding band is the biggest chick magnet there is.”
Luckily, getting down with the funky brown has universal appeal. Men and women. Gay and straight. Single, married and other. You all read this blog, and I’d love to hear your thoughts: Are Married Men More Attractive? Appealing? Alluring?
March 22nd, 2009 at 10:30 pm
but of course….. the urban myth is that they are clean and ” germ free “…. the real skinny
is that they come ( no pun ) with such baggage that you would leave so fast that your
shadow would wonder where did you go….. to be in the Game….. ya gotta be a free agent
and anything less …. starts the real test……
lamesabassman….. if it looks good….. it aint….. be a free agent….
March 23rd, 2009 at 1:50 am
Uh, no. They are not more attractive to me. There are two people at fault when cheating happens. Although I have at times been attracted to men who were married, I think I'd quickly lose interest if they showed interest in me. That's because I'd consider them pretty sleazy, and I like to think that I value a person's intellect and morals, not just body.
March 23rd, 2009 at 7:14 am
Married man are more attractive for many young girls, because they are maturer and richer. Many female members of my favorite herpes dating site POZGROUP.COM said they get the virus by the unfaith husband.
March 23rd, 2009 at 9:36 am
I wonder if there isn't an air of sophistication attributed to a married man. He is more mature (supposedly), responsible, and must have something good if another woman has him. The thought of being able to take a man from another woman, if only temporarily, is also a part of it.
March 23rd, 2009 at 9:49 am
lamesabassman, you're slinging poo right there.
i think it's true, that married men are more attractive, but not desirable.
single dudes give off a vibe that says “I'm on the prowl and trying to get laid.” that's not cute (for single women either).
married men — or even super committed men — on the other hand, are just comfortable because they know it's not going to go anywhere. they're not trying too hard. they're just conversing and being cool. that's mad sexy, though not right for a long-term, serious, monogamous relationship.
funny thing: the moment you get into a relationship is the moment you become sexy to e'erybody else.
March 23rd, 2009 at 9:50 am
I should say “that's mad sexy, though their relationship status is not right…”
March 23rd, 2009 at 9:51 am
I can see why some women are attracted to married men. There's something very safe about them, mainly because they SHOULD be committed to someone else already. The feeling of sexual pressure that single men tend to give off is gone. That false sense of safety probably brings out a lot more risky/provocative behavior since there's the guise that it's all “harmless”. Of course those of us with good sense know that is an extremely slippery slope.
March 23rd, 2009 at 10:13 am
I'm married and consider myself mildy attractive and sexy
=)
March 23rd, 2009 at 12:12 pm
I think a little bit. That old Chris Rock monologue (sp?) comes to mind. Goes something like…When a guy gets into a relationship with a woman, the woman brushes his teeth, combs his hair, cleans the crusty stuff out of his eyes and all of a sudden other women notice. Of course, Chris Rock's delivery is much better than mine and he goes on a lot further.
I am an extremely happily married man. I have one of those “sluts” that you speak of in the blog that LOVES to screw her husband. She is the best. We started dating early on in college, dated 5 years, and have been married almost 10 years. I will say prior to getting into a relationship with her I didn't have many prospects. It was pretty bleak. After being committed to her, I do think I have had more options. More women are willing to talk, flirt, etc.. Maybe it is because I am more confident. Maybe it is because, as some have said, I know and they know it is going nowhere. I think women tend to want a man that is secure, confident, and safe….and , hey lets be honest, being married pretty much rules out that the guy is some kind of psycho that no woman could ever stand to be around more than 5 minutes.
March 23rd, 2009 at 12:36 pm
It seems to me when ever I have a girlfriend seem get flirted with a lot more .
I often come to the site just see your picture. Its a piece of art. Keep the amazing content coming ,
cheers
March 23rd, 2009 at 3:57 pm
Are Married Men More Attractive? Appealing? Alluring?
no…it's just bad voodoo to partake…
March 23rd, 2009 at 6:22 pm
aint that a blip…… yes….. maybe be slangin' poo…. but …. Dang… the miles I've seen
and the trails that I've passed.. well….. I may have the soggiest shouldar in the world…
when the talk starts to walk….. then, the script gets flipped….. some Cosmos's and a great meal…. then….. the words begin to flow …. and the feeling gets very Piaget …
and that when you both feel like it's been forever and forever came today…. things do
happen…. it's a human thing……. some are strong….. and some … go.. long…..
guys as well as the ladies…. at times …. roll that way….. things can be tighter than
Jack Benny and then … the college experiment raises it's familiar head….
do I still have… it…… yes…. it's mad sexy and when you turn the faucet on… in some
cases…. all bets are off….. and the game's afoot….. and yes …. not everyone is like
that …. and one can be an adult and have an hellacool conversation …..
and …. then there's the X factor…. that human equation that's always left out of the
mix…. then stuff happens
lamesabassman….. ” the moment you get in a relationship you become sexy…..”
Shore you right….. aint that a blip…..
March 23rd, 2009 at 6:26 pm
dont start none….
lamesabassman…… wont be none…… smile….. roll it like ya stole it….
March 23rd, 2009 at 6:34 pm
that depends….. does she own a gun….. do you get the local kids to start your car….
smile…. just a little Cali-by-Bklyn humor….. bless you ….. now write the book to show
us the way to Nirvana….. now … if you can roll like that for 48 years like my parents..
by then… your book will be a movie….. just keep it real…. and … mysterious……
and let the Love flow…… always and forever….
lamesabassman…….. ya got a food taster on call……
March 23rd, 2009 at 6:37 pm
kinda like the Ghost Of Christmas Past……
lamesabassman…… just gaining on ya….
March 23rd, 2009 at 7:46 pm
I don't care to date them, but, yes, married men are more attractive partly because I can flirt harmlessly with them, many have a certain amount of stability (financial, emotional, etc), and they have been “trained” and know how to relate to women without appearing to desperate or stalkerish. Maybe it has to do with forbidden fruit most of all.
March 23rd, 2009 at 9:55 pm
I appreciate your honesty!! :)
March 23rd, 2009 at 9:59 pm
Oooooh, good point about the sleaze factor.
March 23rd, 2009 at 10:06 pm
“I'm on the prowl and trying to get laid.” :) Doesn't EVERYONE give off that vibe? ;)
And, you're both spot on about “the moment you get in a relationship” stuff. Well, at least it plays itself out that way in my life.
For what it's worth, it's kind of like that for jobs in general, too, no? It's easier to get a job if you already have a job. The thought being: SOMEONE hired him, so he must be a desirable employee. Same for publishing. SOMEONE published his stuff, so he must be publishable.
March 23rd, 2009 at 10:19 pm
First, congrats on finding a good partner!! :) I love it when dudes comment on my site and speak really highly of the women they're dating and/or married to. Seriously, it's really sweet and cute. :) Baba always says positive and wonderful things about Mrs. Doodlius; she sounds great!!
By the way, I think you're on to something with the whole married men being “safe” thing — i.e. you can flirt because it's not going anywhere. At the same time, being married might not rule out the possibility that the dude's a psycho and/or going to push flirting to the next level.
March 24th, 2009 at 10:20 am
Yes. Yes she is. I love my husband-slut wife! Hubba-hubba!
I honestly don't know if being married makes me more attractive to anybody, because I don't notice if anybody is flirting with me. Maybe women are hitting on me left and right, but I'm not looking and not interested, so I just remain oblivious.
So I'll just say that I *assume* that I am getting more and more attractive every day. I'll just leave it as an untested hypothesis.
March 24th, 2009 at 9:24 pm
it's more like bad karma….everything comes full circle….you know that…
March 25th, 2009 at 12:56 am
Si….. here in Cali…. I see that each and every day….
lamesabassman……. and twice on Sunday…..
March 25th, 2009 at 12:59 am
your future's so bright …. ya just gotta wear shades…..
lamesabassman…… Bravo to Mr. & Mrs. D ……..
March 25th, 2009 at 7:30 am
OK, had to comment on this:
The first of the “Ads by Google” at the top of your site today is called “Cheat on your Wife”, pointing to something called “MoreAgency.com”.
I suppose that, considering your recent site content, this ad is *almost* appropriate, but really, does the world need a web site devoted entirely to infidelity fer cryin' out loud?
March 25th, 2009 at 8:58 am
well…. if it's forbidden fruit…. then how does it taste….. some go to the well and look…
some go and taste…..
lamesabassman…… and …how do you spell relief …… or do you observe and protect…
March 25th, 2009 at 9:00 am
at times….. it pays to advertise……
lamesabassman……. but …. I do see your point, Mr. D ……
November 17th, 2009 at 10:52 am
Using a bit of humor. Try “Please look, but don’t touch.” Or turn the tables and say, “You can touch my tummy if I can touch yours.”