If I Grow A Penis, You’ll Be First to Know
I laughed when I filled out my doctor’s survey. Question: “Contraceptive ______.” My answer: “None. My vibrator can’t get me pregnant.” She said that made her laugh as she read it. :) Apologies for the post-free day yesterday. I had an appointment to see a pulmonologist for a few lung and breathing tests. As I’ve mentioned before, I’m healthy, in good shape and my weight (127 lbs / 58 kg / 9.1 stones) is fine for my height. I also run on a semi-regular basis. Nevertheless, I can’t climb a flight of stairs while taking without getting really winded and increasing my heart rate. So, I went in for pulmonary tests. Apparently, I’ve got inflammation in my lower lungs or something like that. I’m on Asmanex twisthaler treatments for two weeks to clear it up. As a precautionary measure and to rule out more serious stuff, they’re also doing blood work (to make sure I’m not anemic), a stress test (to see how my lungs and heart work under pressure — i.e. climbing stairs) and an ECHO (to make sure the shortness of breath isn’t due to an enlarged heart, lack of blood flow, whatever). I’ll keep you posted on the results. For now, rest assured that no news is good news. After inhaling steroids for two weeks, I should be fine … though I might grow a mustache and a dick. ;) If that happens, of course I’ll take a picture and post it on Flickr!!
On a completely different front, I’m soooooo fucking excited about this weekend. I’m “going” on a staycation with a couple friends from college. I’ll post pictures and details soon.
April 9th, 2009 at 4:44 pm
Well I wish you a speedy recovery.
April 10th, 2009 at 12:33 am
this isn't an envy bit….. is it……
lamesabassman…… give new meaning to ” Flick your Bic”…….
April 10th, 2009 at 10:58 am
Hmm…
Let's hope not!
April 10th, 2009 at 11:01 am
Enjoy your weekend with your new penis!
April 10th, 2009 at 3:06 pm
Hey I was reading an old article you wrote about white men suddenly becoming more attractive to black women when some of them find that they date black women. In one of the comments you and a few others said that you steer clear of white men who ONLY date black women. Why is that..is this some kind of unspoken code..?
April 11th, 2009 at 4:51 am
So far, so good. I don't have a Bic. :)
April 11th, 2009 at 4:53 am
It would be interesting to have a penis for a day. Hmmm …. I'll write about that soon: “If you were a man (or woman) for a day, what do you think would interest you most? What are you most interested in learning about the other sex?”
April 11th, 2009 at 4:53 am
I've still got girl bits … for now. :)
April 11th, 2009 at 4:55 am
I can't speak for others. But, for me, it's more about fetishism. I want to date a guy who wants to date me — not someone who ONLY wants to date a black girl, and they're slotting me in to that preference. I mean, you know, isn't that what everyone wants: someone to love them for who they are?
April 11th, 2009 at 6:10 pm
amen….. sistah……
lamesabassman….. make them come correct…eh… ahh…. no pun intended.
April 11th, 2009 at 6:13 pm
you didnt find one in a box of Cracker Jacks…… now this is hellacool….
soooo…. ya going deep for the last chapter……
lamesabassman….. or did you lose a bet….. hmmm
April 11th, 2009 at 6:15 pm
we going Ph.D deep….. hmmmm…
lamesabassman…. Have a Happy Easter, ya'll 'n' dont OD on the candy….
April 11th, 2009 at 9:52 pm
Hey, if you had both, if somebody told you to go fuck yourself you actually could! That might be neat-o. Once, at least.
April 12th, 2009 at 1:46 pm
that would mean she would be coming and going at the same time…
lamesabassman….. wouldnt you need a flux solenoid ….. or a space
modulator…..
April 13th, 2009 at 3:13 am
I sort of agree with what you're saying, but I have a few points and questions.
Many people do have preferences. For example, I prefer dark hair and brown eyes. I think it becomes a problem only when someone treats the preference as a requirement; in my case that would translate to a refusal to get involved with blondes. So long as it remains a mere preference–someone with dark hair is more likely to catch my attention, I'm somewhat more likely to date someone with dark hair–I don't see any problem with it. But it can be difficult to tell at what point it's a preference and at what point it's an obsession, especially if I don't recognize it myself (obviously, the sort of person who goes around saying “I only date big-breasted redheads” is easy to peg).
If you're basing your assessment on your own observations, it's possible to mistake circumstance for obsession. For instance if you met a white guy and he showed you pictures of his ex-girlfriends and they were all asian, you might think that he has a fetish. But what if you then learned that he grew up in Taiwan, where almost every woman he was likely to meet was asian? Then it becomes a matter of availability; we tend to get involved with the sort of people who are available to us.
We generally agree that the white guy who insists on dating black women is just interested in the external package and not the person. What do we say about the white person who insists on dating only other white people? I guess s/he's frequently called racist. And what do we call the black man or woman who will only get involved with black men or women? I find it interesting that this appears to be ideal as far as some are concerned. A search on the topic leads to a lot of complaints in the vein of “why are all the hot black guys dating outside their race?” (Side note: I remember reading a story in one of Gary Younge's books about being asked what colour his wife was. I tried to look it up but couldn't find it. Does anyone know which book, and what page that was? I suspect it would be from 'No Place Like Home.')
Of course it's also possible to obsess with variety (”I haven't dated one of those before!”). All in all, I think it's rather hard to tell what someone's motives are unless that person is blatantly broadcasting her/his views.
April 13th, 2009 at 6:32 am
You mention, “I think it becomes a problem only when someone treats the preference as a requirement” and “I think it's rather hard to tell what someone's motives are unless that person is blatantly broadcasting her/his views.” Agreed. :) BTW, I'm not sure about the book. Does anyone else know?
April 13th, 2009 at 9:09 am
The reference to the book isn't that important, I just thought if someone knew, offhand… I found it interesting because Gary Younge generally has an interesting take on American culture, being both black and British. Plus it demonstrates that this isn't just a question which is being asked in women's magazines, but is (at least anecdotally) something real people are asking.
April 14th, 2009 at 6:24 am
I have a pretty good understanding of men I think. If i were a man for a day I'd like to f*ck a woman's brains out. Well, now that I mention it, there are tools for such things so I don't actually have to be a man. Being a woman is way cooler, i have no interest in being a man even for a moment. I think women are more intriguing. Perhaps if we didn't have the freedoms that we do. Once upon a time and even now in certain places, there would be an advantage to passing for a man every now and then.
April 17th, 2009 at 9:19 am
but…. ya know …. we get headaches too…. and we cant decide which
tie to wear with what shirt….. we can never find the shoes we like….
and there way too many choices to choose from when we go to the pub
wine…beer…. Jack…. and boy howdy …. when it's comes to buying
a car or motorcycle….. what color and what to put in it or on it….
and to mambo to the dawn's early light…. some can….. and some aint
that bunny with the drum…. but the Dark Question is …. do ladies
like to go alllll night….. or is that gone the way to San Jose….
lamesabassman….. sometimes,being a guy is overrated…..