Bestiality, Swine Flu and You

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I like being an adult better than I liked being a child. When I was little, I couldn’t choose what happened to me, where I lived, what was for dinner or other things. As an adult, my life in my choosing. I live where I want to live, eat what I want to eat and go where I want to go. Right now, I’m a writer living in New York City because that’s what I want to do. And, one of the perks of the freelance writing life is this: I can write about whatever the hell I want to write about. Stick with me. This is going somewhere. Okay, so, rewind. Years before I switched careers, I lived in the Netherlands and worked an office job. Random fact: When you’re hanging out in Holland and speaking Dutch on a regular basis, you learn new Dutch phrases for which you never had an English equivalent. For example, even now, when people talk about food borne illness, it reminds me of “mond en klauwzeer” (not “foot and mouth disease“) because it broke out while I was in Europe and I had to research it. That bored me. I don’t find sick farm animals entirely stimulating, and I hated that I had to do work that required I find out about mond en klauwzeer even though it didn’t interest me simply because it was my job.

Swine flu. Again, I’m not particularly interested in sickly moo-moos and oink-oinks. BUT … We already know animals contract STDs / STIs. And, of course, we know people have sex with animals. So, the only way I’ll write about swine flu is if I choose to do it because: (1) I — or someone I know — gets it or (2) people start fucking pigs with it and their genitals fall off from a rare and unknown sexually transmitted infection. I think THAT would be in interesting read. I like writing things that people consider “an interesting read.” It makes me happy. So, I guess that was a totally random post with a larger message: Live the life you want to live and do what you want to do. Heeeeeeey, I should title this post “Bestiality, Swine Flu and You.” ;)

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Photo credit: image by Steve Woods.

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