From the monthly archives:

May 2009

Sex and Money: Can You Be Bought?

As I already mentioned on Twitter yesterday morning, last night’s plans included stopping by Anna David‘s private launch party for her new novel Bought. Kudos to Anna for a smash hit party!!! Damn it seemed like EVERYONE was there. Page Six even showed up. A chick who either was Emily Gould or looked a helluva lot like her was mingling in the crowds. Tons of familiar faces. LA people. New York people. People who know people. Me? I’m probably a horrible networker because, for the most part and as usual, I spent the whole night talking to people I already knew: Jahfurry (I wish I could’ve made it to the afterparty to hear him and his band), Nick (who’s got tons of pics from the party already posted on Random Night Out), Jamye (I can’t believe she’s leaving us and moving to LA!), Anna (who looked GORGEOUS in her little black dress) and Rachel (who, by the way, is soooo awesome because she returned from Europe with a CHOCOLATE housewarming gift for me.) Given the choice between making small talk with people I don’t know or catching up with folks I adore, I’d rather hang out with my friends. Granted, talking to new people could lead to new friendships. I know this and I’m working at getting better.

I like the picture Nick took of me and Rach. Apparently my cardio is working. This red shirt used to be fitted, now it looks like I’m swimming in it. Time to buy a new one and/or stick this in the dryer longer after the next wash.

Random Night Out - Rachel Kramer Bussel and Twanna A Hines

This Summer: Twanna’s Big Bikini Reveal!!!! In the meantime, if you want to see more fully clothed images, Nick shot great photos of him and Anna, Jeff and Anna, Jamye and me and of course Michael and Anna. Ah, Michael Malice — a Ruskie so deliciously wonderful and PERVERTED he deserves his own FBC post.  ;) Okay, enough about the kickass launch party and more about the book. Full disclosure: I know and adore Anna. So, of course I want her novel to sell really well. I haven’t read Bought in its entirety yet, but it sounds super interesting. To get a taste, you can read the first chapter here. How much do I love it that Bought opens with the James Brown lyric / quote, shake your money maker?!  :) “Here’s how I see it,” Anna explains on her site. “[I]n the same way we don’t go into an interview, utter brilliant asides, and later think, ‘I really used my intelligence to nail that interview,’ we tend not to give much conscious thought to the ways we use our sexuality to get what we want.” She goes on to say that she’s “worked with agents who have made it perfectly clear that they were far more interested in what was between my legs than in what was between my ears.”

A while ago, I attended the New York premiere of  Steven Soderdergh‘s film The Girlfriend Experience at the Tribeca Film Festival. (My article about that is still in the can; it’s one of three on of my List of Outstanding / Overdue Pieces.) Anyway, at that event someone brought up that quote that goes something like ‘capitalism is just another version of prostitution.’ Soderbergh responded, “Life is just a series of transactions. We all want something.” True. Or is it? I mean, yeah, I’ve totally used my sexuality to get my way with men. A short black dress, the right pair of 4′ heels and deep red lipstick opens lots of doors — literally and figuratively speaking. Hmmm … You should take Anna’s “quiz” to find out if you can be bought. Also, feel free to use the comments section below to tell me: Do you think you’ve ever been bought? Have you been buying? And, if so, how?

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{ 10 folks got down with the Funky Brown }

Life in New York City: I’m Moving (Again)

Cue The Jeffersons theme song because I’m movin’ on up to the east side — of Manhattan, that is. Yes, kiddies, I found a new apartment. If you follow me on Twitter or view my Flickr photostream or read my Facebook updates, you already knew this. I’ve been sitting on the news for a week or so. I didn’t want to blog about it until I picked up my keys; I was afraid I’d jinx it (i.e. the building would burn down, they’d lose my deposit check, etc.) because I’m oddly superstitious. I’m happy to report all is well. I love the apartment! I’m sooooo excited about everything I could squeal. Truth be told, I DID squeal the first time I entered the new place. It’s super cute. Thanks to the awesomeness of FloorPlanner, here’s a replica / floor plan:

www.floorplanner.com

By the way, in case you were wondering, I’m moving because I wanted something more centrally located. In 2005, when I first moved to New York, I lived in the West Village and, later, Hell Kitchen. Both neighborhoods were great. But,  I lost my job shortly after settling in. I wasn’t freelancing yet, so my funds plummeted. I pretty much started living off my credit cards and I totally fucking wrecked my credit. :( I didn’t talk (or blog) about it a lot because I was embarrassed. I thought my credit score was like a GPA for the “Are you being a good, responsible adult?” test, and I was flunking because my rank was bottom floor low. On top of that, I thought I was going to be forced to leave New York because I couldn’t afford to live here anymore. Luckily, things worked out and I got back on track. That sentence sounds more “passive” than it should be. Getting back on track didn’t just “happen.” I fought like hell for it. I sold all of my furniture and decreased my expenses by moving further out of the city into a furnished apartment. I also increased my income by working more than one gig: took on social media consulting projects, added more pay-per-click ads to my site, did more freelance article writing, etc. etc. Now that I’ve finally figured out how to live as a freelancer in New York, things are going well. I’ve been stable, making money and fixing my credit for a little while now. Hence, the move. New life. New start. New apartment. I still have to buy furniture to make it feel like home, but I’m going to furnish the whole place with 90% thrift store bargains and  found items. It’s a more unique, greener and less expensive way to decorate. See image below or click here to see pieces and layouts I’m considering:

www.floorplanner.com

Yep, that’s exactly 439 square feet of new home located only a few blocks from Central Park. In New York, I swear the rents are based 90% on location and only 10% on square footage. Take that guy Kevin Patterson, for example. He’s a New Yorker and he won Apartment Therapy‘s contest for the smallest, coolest, teeny tiny apartment. His place is 210 square feet and his monthly rent is $1,550. I’m originally from Illinois — where $1,550/month is considered a “luxury” rate — so I’m still dealing with the sticker shock. Paying less than $2,000/month is actually a really GOOD DEAL for the Upper West Side. This city is insane. Actually — and, yes, this is totally off topic but — speaking of “only in New York” stuff, did you see that New York Times story about the place with a drug dealer as the previous tenant? When the current tenant dude was on vacation, people actually broke into his apartment and tore up the floorboards to get $900,000 rumored to be buried under there. Needless to say, the new guy is moving to a different place now. Glad my previous tenant was a totally awesome chick in new media who (to my knowledge) didn’t stash extra drug cash under the floor. Hmmm, actually, I would’ve liked the extra cash … just not, you know, that whole “druglords chasing it” stuff. ;) Anyway. It’s going to take me a little while to settle in and get the place presentable. I’ll post additional pictures as it starts to looks more like a “home” rather than four bare walls and a floor.

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{ 15 folks got down with the Funky Brown }

Should You Use Your Real Name Online?

NametagI haven’t seen the movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I think it came out around this time last year. I remember because Rach and I were walking through lower Manhattan when we saw “I HATE SARAH MARSHALL” graffiti plastered over billboards and yellow taxicabs. We were like: Ummmm, wouldn’t that be funny if it was actually true? So then the conversation went like:

ME: Imagine if Brad and Angelina Jolie ever split, and she went wacko by launching an anonymous “I HATE YOU BRAD!!!” campaign in Hollywood.

RACHEL: Yeah but ‘Brad’ is such a common name. He could always say it wasn’t him.
ME: True.
RACHEL: But, imagine if someone did that to either of us? Like, I would totally freak out if I walked through town and saw ‘I HATE YOU RACHEL KRAMER BUSSEL’ signs everywhere …
ME: [laughs] Oh, yeah, like, ‘I SOOOOO CAN’T STAND TWANNA A. HINES’ plastered over Manhattan??
RACHEL: [giggles] Exactly!

Sometimes having a ‘unique identifier‘ name kinda sucks. You can’t really “hide.” Take me, for example. There aren’t millions of people in the US with the last name “Hines” and even fewer the first name “Twanna.” So, if you come across a “Twanna Hines” online, it’s me. I’d be lying if I said it doesn’t kind of creep me out that exboyfriends and lovers, college friends, high school enemies, church members and everyone else knows it’s “me” when they stumble across my writing. I always think they’re going to judge me. And, truthfully, some probably do.

In the comments section, I know some of you use your real names and some of you use nicknames. After reading pieces like 10 Reasons Why You Should Use Your Real Name On Twitter (via here) as well as Why don’t you use your real name?, I wonder if more people will switch from nicknames to their real names in the years or, possibly, months ahead. (Time flies online!)

When people ask me what it’s like to put myself out there and/or if they should use their real name online, my answer if always the same: it depends. Sounds trite to say it but, if I knew then what I know now about being “out” online, I’m not sure what (if anything) I would’ve done differently. Writing anonymously (i.e. without showing my face) certainly made me bolder. For example, I sooooo don’t think I would’ve had the courage to post pics of myself in my underwear if I knew others would see me. But, since I DID post anonymous pictures of myself in panties earlier on, it made me more comfortable to pose with a lot of face and not much else later. That said, being “public” has also been kind of limiting. For example, I think writing is cathartic; so, there’s a lot of stuff I’d LIKE to write about — BUT, because I’m no longer anonymous, I feel like I can’t. Ahem, more on THAT topic next week when I talk about the male friends I’ve slept with in my past who’ve recently told me they’re getting married. In the meantime, whether you use a nickname or your real name, I’m curious to know if any of you have good stories about getting “found out” and/or finding someone else out? I seem to remember a certain SOMEONE who regularly comments on the FBC saying something about his son finding pictures of his new wife on an anonymous “big booty” site or something like that?!?! :)

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{ 14 folks got down with the Funky Brown }

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