It would be fantastic if you had a Bullshit Detector. The good news is: you do. It’s called trust. In intimate relationships, if a partner is honest — and exhibits desires, willingness and capabilities upon which you can rely — you might likely deem them trustworthy, that is, worthy of your trust.

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When I’m scared or upset, I stop breathing. When I’m hurt, I cry. When I’m unsure what to do, I laugh. Mindful reflection has taught me to breathe deeply from my abdomen and relax as I acknowledge what my body and instincts are telling me. In love, although confessing my emotions to a partner exposes me to vulnerability, it’s often in that open state that I’ve learned the most about my partners’ intentions.

Are they insensitive? If your partner shows little concern for your emotions, they may simply be a bit insensitive. If you or your partner is emotionally closed or simply not paying attention, you may be missing needs they are communicating to you. Be there for your partner, and be emotionally honest. However, if you’re vulnerable and they continue to display a lack concern, determine whether or not you should trust their desire, willingness and capability to love you the way you wish to be loved.

Are they emotionally abusive? Trust should be earned, not necessarily given indiscriminately. One of the proudest moments in my career arrived via a high school group’s thank you letter delivered after I taught them a Healthy Relationships workshop. I’ll share these tips with you, my little sweets. Tomorrow’s update is already finished: How to Steer Clear of Crazy, Sociopathic, Rage-Filled Lovers. Subscribe to receive an automatic notice once it’s live.