I have a story for you. By now, you’ve probably heard the U.S. has a black president, right? :) During the 2008 election campaign, A Peach-Skinned Guy Friend Who Shall Remain Nameless (APSGWSRN) gave me shit because I didn’t originally contribute to APSGWSRN’s fundraiser or go to a lot of the events he arranged.

HIM: “I really expected you to be there. Obama would be our first African-American president. This would be really historic.”

By way of context/background … APSGWSRN comes from privilege. Elite boarding school. Ivy League. Etc. I was proud of his volunteering/service to Obama. That said, I didn’t appreciate him spoon-feeding me guilt about not being as (visibly) active as he was. Just because I didn’t specifically contribute to APSGWSRN’s cause doesn’t mean I didn’t contribute to the cause. Plus, I thought, but didn’t say, “By the way, where were you in 2004?” Because, you know what? Even back then, Obama was still black. And, he was running for a seat in a U.S. Senate that hadn’t seen anyone who looked like him since 1999 when Carol Moseley Braun was there. However, in 2004, Obama wasn’t fashionable. Many people outside of Illinois hadn’t heard his name — nor could they pronounce it. And, it wasn’t hip to say “I volunteered for Obama” because, quite frankly, who cared. Yet, had Obama not won the Illinois seat, he wouldn’t be APSGWSRN’s president right now.

Same with Haiti. The country was poor and in need of help before the earthquake … and still needs help. Sometimes, it’s not about putting your money where your mouth is. It’s about shutting your mouth, and putting your money where your heart is.

If you see this note, you're reading my site via its RSS feed. If links, video clips, photos or other media don't work here, visit FUNKY BROWN CHICK via the link below:

Go, Twanna! It’s Your Birthday. (No, Really, It Is.)

If you see this note, you're reading my site via its RSS feed. If links, video clips, photos or other media don't work here, visit FUNKY BROWN CHICK via the link below:

Manly Monday: Barack Obama, Nobel Laureate

Sexy men are sexy men, and I don’t care what shade they are. When active on online dating sites, I’ve shot emails to Indian, Asian, black and white dudes. If you’ve played the internet dating game, you know some people respond to your emails, winks and other e-flirting. Some don’t. For what it’s worth, to be honest, for the MIA dudes who weren’t black, I’ve often wondered: “Did he not write me back because he wasn’t interested in ME or does he not date black girls, period?” Could be either, could be something else entirely. I don’t know much about the non-Twannalovers because it would’ve been weird to ask, “Heeeey, why didn’t you write me back?!?!” Plenty of men in New York. No need to chase ones who aren’t into me, right? I just go out on dates with other (white, black, foreign or whatever) guys who are interested. Weeeell, enter OkCupid.

The picture above is from their recent survey data. Last week, they announced they discovered your race affects whether people write you back on their site. For example, Anonymous Asian ladies writing black men on OkCupid get relatively high response rates. But, when tables are turned, Asian women are more likely to shove a cold shoulder at black men who initiate contact. So much from blasian love, huh? OkCupid’s other results? White men are less likely to respond to black women. “The takeaway here is,” the company concluded, “although race shouldn’t matter in messaging, it does. A lot.” If you’re interested in the survey, read the rest of the results over at OkCupid.

You think I’d be pissed off about the their findings, right? Well, yes and no. Shamus Dalton Witherford IV doesn’t want to date Twanna Hines? Fine. He doesn’t have to. I can’t necessarily wholly fault someone for their dating preferences. In fact, I’d rather someone say straight out they AREN’T interested in dating different race/ethnicities than check boxes indicating they are — then conveniently proceed to avoid responding to women who don’t match their preferences. If you’re a white dude who only dates white women, be honest about it. If you’re an Asian lesbian looking for a 5′10″ black woman in a petite frame. Say that. If you’re a Latino dude who wants a short white girl with full curves, go for it! Why waste anyone’s time? No one likes rejection. Having been on it’s receiving end, I don’t like it when I “put myself out” there to men — regardless of ethnicity, whether online or offline — and don’t get a response. It makes me feel awkward and unwanted. But, mostly, it makes me feel silly! It’s like, “Ewww! I went after a guy who wasn’t even interested. I don’t want to be that ‘Desperate Girl.’” But enough about my Adventures in Online Dating. I wanna talk about something I mentioned on Twitter last night.

If you’ve not yet heard the news, Keith Bardwell, a justice of the peace in Louisiana, denied a marriage license to Beth Humphrey and Terence McKay since he doesn’t think they should have children because he’s black and she’s white. Quoting Bardwell (via NPR):

“I’m not a racist. I just don’t believe in mixing the races [...] I have piles and piles of black friends. They come to my home [...] they use my bathroom. I treat them just like everyone else.”

When I shared the article on my Facebook earlier, a handsome Aussie pal jokingly commented, “I’m worried that he keeps his black friends in piles.” I laughed because his comment is funny :) And, now, for the more serious side …. WHAT. THE. FUCK. IS. GOING. ON. IN. LOUISIANA?! This gets back to what I was writing about earlier. [Points up a few paragraphs.] There aren’t laws saying anyone HAS TO date or marry anyone else because, quite frankly, they don’t. Hell, any black person can say, “I don’t date white people.” And, vice versa. Preferences, schmeferences. No one HAS TO date interracially (hate that term), but that’s not the point. Anyone who WANTS to date or get married should be able to. Loving v. Virginia anyone? 1967? It’s almost 2010. Hmmm, I guess that all I have to say. So, on second thought, instead of this really really long blogpost, I could’ve summed my feelings up with a simple sentence and a link: It’s disappointing and weird that we’re “here” again — revisiting/referencing such basic, fundamental rights.

————–

Pssst! Interested in Loving v. Virginia? If you missed it, I wrote about the couple — and about how Van Morrison’s song Brown-Eyed Girl was supposedly originally titled Brown-Skinned Girl — in a October 2005 Funky Brown Chick post called Making Love in the Green Grass.

If you see this note, you're reading my site via its RSS feed. If links, video clips, photos or other media don't work here, visit FUNKY BROWN CHICK via the link below:

Down With Interracial Dating and Marriage?

Heads up: The next Manly Monday pick — weekly Funky Brown Chick celebrations of everything with testosterone — will be the Kennedy men. Photo credit: New York Times. In the meantime, check out NYTimes’ detailed coverage of Ted Kennedy’s passing.

If you see this note, you're reading my site via its RSS feed. If links, video clips, photos or other media don't work here, visit FUNKY BROWN CHICK via the link below:

Sneak Peek: The Kennedy Men (Next Manly Monday)

h/t Jose Vilson

If you see this note, you're reading my site via its RSS feed. If links, video clips, photos or other media don't work here, visit FUNKY BROWN CHICK via the link below:

Because Some Things Can’t Wait Until Manly Monday …

“[Mark and Terri Riding's] children are all healthy, normal-looking individuals, but it’s their 9-year-old adopted sister/daughter Katie O’Dea-Smith who draws all the attention.You see, the Ridings are Black and Katie is White [...] In a candid interview, ESSENCE.com spoke to the Ridings about why they adopted Katie, how they handle all the misguided attention, and how they plan to have an honest conversation about race with their White daughter.” [Continue reading.]

If you’d like to learn more about the family, you can also check out this Newsweek piece or this blogHer post.

If you see this note, you're reading my site via its RSS feed. If links, video clips, photos or other media don't work here, visit FUNKY BROWN CHICK via the link below:

Black Couple Adopts White Daughter (Interracial Adoption)

It’s been said, “[b]lack is not just a skin color; it’s a quality of voice.” Tony Award-winning performer Sarah Jones and linguist John McWhorter talk about this topic further on PRI & WNYC’s “Studio 360 with Kurt Andersen” clip below. (Produced by Studio 360’s Derek John.)

Audio URL: http://audio.wnyc.org/studio/studio102408c.mp3

Nearly four years ago, I launched my site and named it Funky Brown Chick. I might move to a different city, switch up my profession or make other changes in my life, but three things will always stay the same. I’m always going to be funky. Before I was born, the word for people who looked like me morphed from “colored” to “black.” Lately, it’s African American. And, it likely the name will change again. Nevertheless, I’m always going to have brown skin. And, I’m always going to be “chicky.” I’ve been a funky brown chick since birth. I’ll still be a funky brown chick in the future.

No one needs to tell me I’m black because I already know that. So, here’s a wacky concept: It’s quite possible the sound of one’s voice — just as their chosen profession (e.g. sex/relationship writing) — doesn’t always clue you in about the person’s internal views about self-identity. Here’s an even MORE insane thought: Why don’t we agree all people are allowed to speak, write about topics, think and act as they please — no matter what they look like. I know, I know. It’s a downright kooky idea. Just saying.

————
Hear my voice: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0l9Z0f4fqI

Related book: Not a Genuine Black Man: Or, How I Claimed My Piece of Ground in the Lily-White Suburbs

If you see this note, you're reading my site via its RSS feed. If links, video clips, photos or other media don't work here, visit FUNKY BROWN CHICK via the link below:

Do I Sound Black?

He wants his kidney back.

Two questions: (1) Would you give away a kidney to a loved one who needed it and (2) should this Batista dude get his kidney — or its financial equivalent — back?

————–
Related: Man wants wife’s kidney back–or $1.5M

If you see this note, you're reading my site via its RSS feed. If links, video clips, photos or other media don't work here, visit FUNKY BROWN CHICK via the link below:

Divorce & the Nip Tucked Kidney

There’s No Christmas in Darfur (Monday Dec 15 @ 7:30pm, The Bell House located at 149 7th St., 718-643-6510, $25.) What’s hotter than fine ass Ryan Gosling wearing a Darfur t-shirt on the MTV Movie Awards? NOTHING. Well, maybe, the “There’s No Christmas in Darfur” benefit. (Pssst! People, did you SEE the best kiss reenactment??? I almost fainted from the hotness. But, I digress.) Hosted by comedian and friend of the FBC Liam McEneaney, Monday’s benefit for Save Darfur includes the Daily Show’s John Oliver, comic Todd Barry, Hot Tub host Kurt Braunohler and a bunch of other funnymen. “You’d be hard-pressed,” says Flavorpill, “to find a more rewarding — or funnier — way to spend your bucks on a good cause.” It’s only $25. Plus, they’re giving out prizes from Comedy Central and The Onion. Please support it. Totally worth it.

9th Ward Field of Dreams. (Donate any amount by Monday 12/15, Website: http://9thwardfieldofdreams.com) “When I was down in New Orleans this past October,” Judy McGuire mentions, “I was horrified to see that the Ninth Ward is still completely wrecked.” Given a tour of the area by a local high school teacher, Judy learned kids had neither books nor safe spaces to run around and play. “Pretty much every child there has lost something,” Judy said pretty honestly, “even if it’s ‘just’ their home.” GW Carver High School wants to build a community football field/track to bring entertainment, play and the spirit of happiness back to the lives of those touched by Katrina. If they raise 200k by the 12/15 deadline, NFL’s Grassroots Program might do a matching gift. Please give. Any amount helps. Details: http://9thwardfieldofdreams.com.

NYC Sex Bloggers Calendar. Of course I’m gonna plug the calendar — not just because I’m Miss March, but because your $20 actually goes to a good cause and because Tess is such a fucking saint for organizing the whole thing, and Diva’s been doing awesome stuff to promote it. Money from your purchase / donation goes to Audacia Ray’s nonprofit Sex Work Awareness. SWA does sexy stuff like support institutions that help sex workers, conduct research about the sex industry, develop public education initiatives and other things. By the way, as a reminder, I’ll sign your calendar for you if you buy one. Read this to find out how to make that happen.

Vigil to End Violence Against Sex Workers. Speaking of sex worker rights and stuff, there’s gonna be a candlelight vigil from 7 – 8 pm on Wednesday, December 17th in New York’s newly reopened Washington Square Park to commemorate the International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers. If you can’t give money, give time by dropping by the march to support the cause.

National Public Radio. If you haven’t heard the news, NPR is cancelling a couple shows. I gave my first donation to NPR a couple years ago when I still lived in Chicago. I was listening to This American Life on WBEZ because I fucking love that show. During a pledge drive (surprise, surprise), David Sedaris and Ira Glass tried to convince this random woman to give money. I think she gave like $20. So, the NPR folks were like: “Say it with us: I. Saved. Public Radio.” She wouldn’t because she was like, “My $20 didn’t save NPR.” And, they were like: no, seriously, we need donations & each one collectively “saves” NPR. I got that. I donated the next day and got a kickass “I Saved Public Radio” mug for my efforts. Donate today to save NPR. In particular, if you’re a fan of News & Notes ( … all Funky Brown Chick readers should be because they kindly had me as a guest on their show … ), please join this Facebook group to learn how to help snatch the show off the chopping block.

————-
Credit paid: Images appear online as follows – Ninth ward (AP Photo/Don Ryan); prostitute (Der Spiegel); News & Notes team ( NPR); calendar girls (my Flickr); and Ryan Gosling Save Darfur (ecorazzi).

If you see this note, you're reading my site via its RSS feed. If links, video clips, photos or other media don't work here, visit FUNKY BROWN CHICK via the link below:

Twanna’s 2008 “Holiday Giving” Guide

The Backgrounder: Illinois is corrupt. Seriously. Fucking New York sent “Scarface” Al Capone from Brooklyn to Chicago in 1923; by 1924, he was almost running the place — taking ownership of Cicero’s town council. Barack Obama’s original opponent for the IL senate seat, Jack Ryan, paid someone to stalk Obama. Under cover of night, Mayor Daley once secretly ordered wrecking crews to bulldoze huge X-shaped craters in a small aiport’s runway because (Chicago voters wishes be damned!!!) he wanted it closed. And, speaking of airports, you know Chicago “O’Hare” is named after the son of “Easy Eddie” O’Hare — a mob lawyer who willfully collaborated and made a fortune with Scarface. Later, O’Hare got in bed with the Feds to bring Capone down; the gangster gave O’Hare a Chicago-style “thank you” by having him gunned down in his car. In the past 40 years, I think 4 out of 8 (or, depending how you count, 3 out of 6 … doesn’t matter, it’s half either way) IL governors have had brushes with federal prison. I’m not sure any state can match that. Shit, even the saying “vote early, vote often” specifically refers to Illinois’ long history of politicians/gangsters manipulating votes. Be ye not fooled by the Midwestern smiles; Iraq is less of a political minefield than Springfield, Illinois. People, I’m telling you: There are gangsters in them there cornfields!!

NO ONE in Illinois is surprised about Blagojevich. No one!!! :) The man is goofy. What other statesman cusses more than Tony Soprano? (Blag on Obama: “Fuck him!”) Who the hell goes on The Daily Show without knowing it’s a comedy??? A year or two ago, when The Daily Show interviewer called Gov. Blagojevich “Gov. Smith” because he couldn’t pronounce his name, asked him to pretend he was a hot 17-year-old who needed contraceptives and questioned whether he was the real “gay Governor”, Blagojevich’s response was: “Is he teasing me, or is this legit?” Who does that??? “With all due respect to the governor,” said someone baffled by the incident, “he [had to know] it was a comedy show. It’s general knowledge for people under 90 years of age.” And, of course, the newest goofiness from G-Rod Blago … apparently, the guy tried to “sell” Barack Obama’s Senate seat to the highest bidder. The seat, he said, “is a fucking valuable thing, you don’t just give it away for free!” So, if anyone out there is still wondering: “What the hell is going on in Illinois?” The answer is what it has always been: “Politics as usual.”

If you see this note, you're reading my site via its RSS feed. If links, video clips, photos or other media don't work here, visit FUNKY BROWN CHICK via the link below:

Who is Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich?