Twanna A. Hines @ FUNKYBROWNCHICK.com | sex. dating. relationships.

Getting to The Finish Line: How to Write a Book

It’s National Novel Writing Month. Basically, a bunch of people will to start writing November 1 and continue for 50,000 words / 175-pages until November 30. It probably sounds harder than it is because, believe it or not, quite a few people have done it. How to Knit a Love Song, Flying Changes: A Novel, Wish You Were Here and other books are reportedly successful NaNoWriMo projects. I’m not participating this year because I’m smack at the tail end of my finishing up my memoir and I don’t want to get distracted by starting another project. And, since, we’re on the topic of writing in general, here’s the latest update about the book … I’ve written 79,609 words. I have three chapters to finish re-editing. For now, I aim to wrap it up by late December / early January. On Twitter, Affable Alpha asked me, “Is it preferable to write the entire novel before submitting it? I feel like doing so would be a waste of time [...] I was thinking of writing a synopsis for every chapter of the novel and then submit it to the literary agent or publisher.” Ah, the ongoing “proposal” vs “full manuscript” debate. I chose the latter route to:

1. Follow advice. One of my writing mentors successfully wrote and sold 7 books in the past 7 years. Each time, she handed in a full manuscript instead of a proposal. It worked for her, and she suggests her students do the same.
2. Reduce stress. I’ve written articles, penned columns and contributed chapters to others’ anthologies. But, this is my first full memoir. As I mentioned in my last update, it’s nice to take as long as I need to grow, learn and finish it — without the added stress of looming deadlines from editors. That will come later :)
3. Get it out of the way. As more than one published authors reminded me: “It’s not like finishing the proposal means you don’t have to write the book. You’ve gotta write it anyway, so may as well do it now.”
4. Understand the Project. For me, the biggest benefit of writing the full thing is that I’ve come to understand my project MUCH better. When I started, I didn’t have a clear sense of what I was doing with it. I knew I was writing a memoir, but the outline was pretty vague. I’m much more focused now that I’ve written the first full draft.

That said, quite frankly, I don’t think there’s one “right” way to write a book. Jean-Dominique Bauby supposedly finished The Diving Bell and the Butterfly by blinking the whole thing out one letter at a time over the course of a year or so. NaNoWriMo are sprinting through it all in a month. Cliff Chase, one of my favorite people from my time spent working as a peon at Newsweek, told me he dedicated many many years to finishing Winkie. (The book Writing a book is like completing marathon. Both require a tremendous amount of motivation, effort and time. But, the purpose isn’t to “win.” It’s about finishing it at your own pace to accomplish whatever personal goal(s) you’ve set for yourself. So, I guess the question: “How should I write a book?” is: Follow whichever way works for you and stick with it the best you can until you finish.

———

Credit paid: Marathon image is by Randy Lemoine

Technorati Tags: funky brown chick, funkybrownchick, Twanna A. Hines, write a book

November 3rd, 2009 | Print This Post | link | Email This Post | [3] folks got down with the Funky Brown

My Book Status Update: September 17, 2009

Almost finished. I stayed up past 3:00am working on my book last night. It’s been a while since I’ve given you guys an update and a few of you have emailed me to ask about it. Instead of writing everyone back individually (I suck at email!), here’s the status update … As many of you know, I’m finishing a memoir. I completed the first full draft earlier this year and I’ve been editing it over the past several months. At present, it’s 283 pages long and divided into 13 chapters, though it’s likely to get shorter or longer in these final months of revisions. I’ve been approached by agents and a publishing house, but I’ve decided to not sign with anyone until I have a finished product. This is my first book. So, in these early stages, it’s nice to take as long as I need to learn, grow, figure things out and finish it — without the added stress of looming deadlines from editors. That will come later :) In the meantime, when my schedule permits, I attend writing groups to vet my title ideas, have a second pair of eyes look at my pages and simply commiserate with other writers who truly “get” what publishing is all about. I feel really fortunate mentors, friends and others I respect have written successful books of their own; I’m grateful for their guidance. Many have offered to read my book, give feedback and/or let me what to expect throughout this whole process.

As I mentioned earlier, my next step is to finish editing my book. I’m in the final stretch, and I don’t think it will take longer than the end of the year. After that, I’ll talk to colleagues as well as conduct my own research to find out which agent would be a good fit for this particular project. I’ve been given a few names. And, when the appropriate time comes, I’ll make contact. Once I’ve linked up with a good agent, they’ll likely suggest additional edits before approach publishing housing with my book. When/if the publisher buys it, they’ll likely request more revisions before they print it. Once that and a few other items are completed, the book will be printed and readily available for purchase on shelves and online at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Powell’s and elsewhere. I’ll keep you posted. If you have any particular question, comments or specific questions, feel free to leave it in the comments section.

————–
Image by: Ivan Prole

Technorati Tags: blog to book deal, funky brown chick, funkybrownchick, how to write a book, publishing industry, Twanna A. Hines

September 17th, 2009 | Print This Post | link | Email This Post | [12] folks got down with the Funky Brown

Reading: Why I Chose to Be Childless [MORE magazine]

I’m not in my 40s, but I like reading MORE magazine because the tone is smart, adult and interesting. I just read this piece by Stephanie Mills, and I thought I’d share it with you. As many of you know, I’m happily childfree and I don’t have any desire to have kids. I used to say, “I’m never having children” but I’ve soften my stance in recent years. That’s not to say I’ve changed my mind … I just think words like “always” and “never” are a bit too absolute and finite. Who the hell knows what I’ll think 10 or 20 years down the road? Yeah, I mean, sure, my womb doesn’t have anything growing in it RIGHT NOW, and I’m quite happy with that. As far as I know, I’ll still be happy without children in the foreseeable future. Only time will tell. In any case, it’s interesting to read Mills’ thoughts.

“Even though my decision not to have children was made on what might be called political grounds it proved to be a good personal choice. [...] Given my particular nature, the responsibility and distraction of childrearing most likely would have prevented me from pursuing my work as a writer, which has been immensely rewarding, if difficult and uncertain much of the time [...]

[Continue reading at MORE magazine]

Technorati Tags: childfree, children, funky brown chick, funkybrownchick, Men, sex, single, Stephanie Mills, Twanna A. Hines, women

August 21st, 2009 | Print This Post | link | Email This Post | [17] folks got down with the Funky Brown

Sex and Money: Can You Be Bought?

As I already mentioned on Twitter yesterday morning, last night’s plans included stopping by Anna David’s private launch party for her new novel Bought. Kudos to Anna for a smash hit party!!! Damn it seemed like EVERYONE was there. Page Six even showed up. A chick who either was Emily Gould or looked a helluva lot like her was mingling in the crowds. Tons of familiar faces. LA people. New York people. People who know people. Me? I’m probably a horrible networker because, for the most part and as usual, I spent the whole night talking to people I already knew: Jahfurry (I wish I could’ve made it to the afterparty to hear him and his band), Nick (who’s got tons of pics from the party already posted on Random Night Out), Jamye (I can’t believe she’s leaving us and moving to LA!), Anna (who looked GORGEOUS in her little black dress) and Rachel (who, by the way, is soooo awesome because she returned from Europe with a CHOCOLATE housewarming gift for me.) Given the choice between making small talk with people I don’t know or catching up with folks I adore, I’d rather hang out with my friends. Granted, talking to new people could lead to new friendships. I know this and I’m working at getting better.

I like the picture Nick took of me and Rach. Apparently my cardio is working. This red shirt used to be fitted, now it looks like I’m swimming in it. Time to buy a new one and/or stick this in the dryer longer after the next wash.

This Summer: Twanna’s Big Bikini Reveal!!!! In the meantime, if you want to see more fully clothed images, Nick shot great photos of him and Anna, Jeff and Anna, Jamye and me and of course Michael and Anna. Ah, Michael Malice — a Ruskie so deliciously wonderful and PERVERTED he deserves his own FBC post.  ;) Okay, enough about the kickass launch party and more about the book. Full disclosure: I know and adore Anna. So, of course I want her novel to sell really well. I haven’t read Bought in its entirety yet, but it sounds super interesting. To get a taste, you can read the first chapter here. How much do I love it that Bought opens with the James Brown lyric / quote, shake your money maker?!  :) “Here’s how I see it,” Anna explains on her site. “[I]n the same way we don’t go into an interview, utter brilliant asides, and later think, ‘I really used my intelligence to nail that interview,’ we tend not to give much conscious thought to the ways we use our sexuality to get what we want.” She goes on to say that she’s “worked with agents who have made it perfectly clear that they were far more interested in what was between my legs than in what was between my ears.”

A while ago, I attended the New York premiere of  Steven Soderdergh’s film The Girlfriend Experience at the Tribeca Film Festival. (My article about that is still in the can; it’s one of three on of my List of Outstanding / Overdue Pieces.) Anyway, at that event someone brought up that quote that goes something like ‘capitalism is just another version of prostitution.’ Soderbergh responded, “Life is just a series of transactions. We all want something.” True. Or is it? I mean, yeah, I’ve totally used my sexuality to get my way with men. A short black dress, the right pair of 4′ heels and deep red lipstick opens lots of doors — literally and figuratively speaking. Hmmm … You should take Anna’s “quiz” to find out if you can be bought. Also, feel free to use the comments section below to tell me: Do you think you’ve ever been bought? Have you been buying? And, if so, how?

Technorati Tags: Anna David, book, books, Bought, Emily Gould, GFE, Girlfriend Experience, Jahfurry, Jamye Waxman, Jeff Newelt, Michael Malice, money, Nick McGlynn, novel, prostitution, Rachel Kramer Bussel, Random Night Out, sex, Steven Soderbergh, Twanna A. Hines

May 19th, 2009 | Print This Post | link | Email This Post | [10] folks got down with the Funky Brown

Bestiality, Swine Flu and You

I like being an adult better than I liked being a child. When I was little, I couldn’t choose what happened to me, where I lived, what was for dinner or other things. As an adult, my life in my choosing. I live where I want to live, eat what I want to eat and go where I want to go. Right now, I’m a writer living in New York City because that’s what I want to do. And, one of the perks of the freelance writing life is this: I can write about whatever the hell I want to write about. Stick with me. This is going somewhere. Okay, so, rewind. Years before I switched careers, I lived in the Netherlands and worked an office job. Random fact: When you’re hanging out in Holland and speaking Dutch on a regular basis, you learn new Dutch phrases for which you never had an English equivalent. For example, even now, when people talk about food borne illness, it reminds me of “mond en klauwzeer” (not “foot and mouth disease“) because it broke out while I was in Europe and I had to research it. That bored me. I don’t find sick farm animals entirely stimulating, and I hated that I had to do work that required I find out about mond en klauwzeer even though it didn’t interest me simply because it was my job.

Swine flu. Again, I’m not particularly interested in sickly moo-moos and oink-oinks. BUT … We already know animals contract STDs / STIs. And, of course, we know people have sex with animals. So, the only way I’ll write about swine flu is if I choose to do it because: (1) I — or someone I know — gets it or (2) people start fucking pigs with it and their genitals fall off from a rare and unknown sexually transmitted infection. I think THAT would be in interesting read. I like writing things that people consider “an interesting read.” It makes me happy. So, I guess that was a totally random post with a larger message: Live the life you want to live and do what you want to do. Heeeeeeey, I should title this post “Bestiality, Swine Flu and You.” ;)

——————–
Photo credit: image by Steve Woods.

Technorati Tags: beastiality, bestiality, cows, Dutch, food borne illness, funky brown chick, funkybrownchick, mond en klauwzeer, pigs, sexually transmitted diseases, STD, STDs, STI, STIs, swine flu, The Netherlands, Twanna A. Hines

April 26th, 2009 | Print This Post | link | Email This Post | [9] folks got down with the Funky Brown

Book Update: Rough 1st Draft Is Done

No Manly Monday today. Sorry. I need to hijack today’s post because a couple of you asked questions about my book, and I want to update you on its status … apologies in advance for the random blabber; this post has absolutely NO form … Okay, so, basically, there are (at least) two ways to sell a book. You can either: (1) write a proposal or (2) write the whole damn book. A proposal is like a business plan. You craft a 20 – 30 page document that says: “Okay, here’s what I plan to write, and here’s why I think people will buy it.” Tack on a couple sample chapters. Give it to an agent who, in turn, shops it around a couple publishing houses. Voila book deal! :) Actually, it’s a bit more complex than that, but it’s definitely less time consuming than the other option: write the whole damn thing.

Biggest benefit to the proposal route? If your book idea sucks and no one wants to buy it, you haven’t “wasted” a lot of time working on the project. On the other hand, if the idea is great, you get your advance faster and you don’t have to wait the entire year (or more) when the book is finished.

Biggest benefit to pounding the whole thing out? Your advance is likely to be bigger because they’re paying for a full project instead of a “proposed” project. Plus, at the end of the day — if you want to “sell” a book — you’ve gotta “write” it anyway, so you might as well just do it.

I spent 1/2 of last year figuring out what my book should be about. Once I got that nailed down, I had to work on a lot of emotional baggage. Self-doubt pissed all over my fucking book. I told myself, “This is the longest thing I’ve ever written. I don’t even know how I’ll finish it.” As I wrote chapters, I repeatedly said, “This chapter is never going to get done.” Throwing negativity at the project wasn’t helping, but I was being honest. Partly, maybe I was afraid of finishing  … “What if no one likes my typescript and I can’t get it published?” or “What if it gets published and no one buys the book.” or “What if it gets published and people buy it, but family members, ex-boyfriends and others I mention in my book all start to hate me for the things I’ve revealed.”

[sigh]

Nothing else to add to that besides a big long sigh, I guess. Whatever. Anyway. I’m working through it.

I’ve now written 11 of my book’s 11 chapters. It’s still not “done.” Some bits are in better shape than others — the most recently finished three chapters still need a lot of work. Like, A LOT. I’m going to spend the next couple of months (maybe more) editing, revising, restructuring the whole thing. After that, I’ll begin pitching agents. So, that’s the scoop. As more news rolls in, I’ll keep you posted.

In the meantime, on a completely different note … As I mentioned on Twitter last night, I’ve kept a written journal since I was in sixth grade. Every now and then, I revisit old entries to remember who I was in grade school, junior high, college or whatever. It’s a lot like flipping through a high school yearbook (”Oh, I remember him … “) Anyway. Thought I’d snap a quick picture of a funny entry from August 1991. My handwriting was much neater then.

C’est tout. My fingers are tired of typing. :( I spent A LOT of time working on the book this weekend.

Technorati Tags: book, book proposal, books, funky brown chick, funkybrownchick, how to sell a book, how to write a book, manuscript, Twanna A. Hines

April 6th, 2009 | Print This Post | link | Email This Post | [12] folks got down with the Funky Brown

Who Wants a Free Sex Bloggers Calendar?

It’s Manly Monday, but I don’t have any male eye candy for you today. I recently worked on my book for almost twelve hours straight — 6:00pm Saturday night until 6:00am Sunday morning. I went to bed, woke up late and pulled another 8-hour stretch. Today, I woke up and thought NO MORE WRITING. My fingers are tired of typing. So, since it’s the first day of March, I’ll simply post this picture:

It’s my pin-up shot from the 2009 NYC Sex Bloggers Calendar. Yep, I’m “Miss March.” Read about the project here. And, as a THANK YOU to the lovely Funky Brown Chick readers who log on each day to read my Words o’ Goofdom — even when they aren’t particular exciting, like today — I’ll send a FREE calendar to the first five people who email me their domestic or international mailing address. To email me, go here, scroll down and enter your full contact details. Thanks, again, for reading. More words tomorrow after my fingers have returned from their self-imposed strike.

Technorati Tags: 2009 NYC Sex Bloggers Calendar, calendar girl, funky brown chick, funkybrownchick, pin-up, Twanna A. Hines

March 2nd, 2009 | Print This Post | link | Email This Post | [6] folks got down with the Funky Brown

Wanna See My First Hotel Sex Tape?

Remember when you were a little kid and you paired up with your friends to do school projects and stuff? Well, one of the fun things about being an adult is “school projects” are now “work projects.” And, when you actually like your job, the projects are fun. My friend Rachel Kramer Bussel just published a book called Do Not Disturb: Hotel Sex Stories. Films have “film trailers” to tease your eyeballs and convince you to see the project. Books have “book trailers” to accomplish the same goal. So, for Do Not Disturb, Rach gathered a bunch of us together to help out. “There will be no nudity,” she wrote in an email, “but I want to show people having fun in a hotel room [...] basically lounge around sexily, look hot, have fun, maybe make out or simulate making out, stuff like that.” Plus, she even threw in pizza and booze!!!! Voila!

If you’re reading this via RSS (on Google Reader, Facebook, etc.) and the clip doesn’t load above, see it on Funky Brown Chick, Lusty Lady, YouTube, the Do Not Disturb blog and elsewhere. Tons of awesome people were involved in the photographing (go Stacie!!!), filming and making of the trailer. See Rach’s post for the full credits.

Technorati Tags: Do Not Disturb, erotica, funky brown chick, funkybrownchick, hotel, Rachel Kramer Bussel, sex, Twanna A. Hines, YouTube

February 22nd, 2009 | Print This Post | link | Email This Post | [14] folks got down with the Funky Brown