Founded by Twanna A. Hines, FUNKY BROWN CHICK® provides commentary on American sexuality.
5 Things I Learned from the FIFA World Cup Trophy

5 Things I Learned from the FIFA World Cup Trophy

I was recently invited to attend the U.S. Department of State’s 2014 FIFA World Cup Trophy Tour event, hosted by Secretary of State John Kerry. I participated in a policy briefing with Department officials about U.S. sports diplomacy efforts and digital strategy in general, met former U.S. Men’s National Team soccer players Cobi Jones and Tony Sanneh, and sat six rows from the stage as Kerry and Vice President Joe Biden addressed our group.

I Made St. Patrick’s Day 8K "Top 10 Female Teams"

I Made St. Patrick’s Day 8K “Top 10 Female Teams”

I rallied five friends to join me for my first 8K. We were Latina, black, and white women who ranged in age from 28 to 42, but our multiple-ethnic group’s unifier was simple: We’d all hump Colin Farrell in a heartbeat.

Join Me, Dan Savage & Others for the Sochi Olympics

Join Me, Dan Savage & Others for the Sochi Olympics

If you’re watching the 2014 Winter Olympic Games, catch me, fellow sex columnist Dan Savage, “Share This! How You Will Change the World with Social Networking” author Deanna Zandt and others blabbing along in realtime from 7:00 – 11:00 pm ET on Friday in the #CheersToSochi Opening Ceremonies War Room Virtual Event.

35 and Single

35 and Single

“An Argentine woman, documenting her relationships, begins an intimate investigation searching for love and answers: must she settle down or continue to be a free spirit in order to be happy? ‘When you love and accept yourself totally, the world around you changes. In the end, happiness is a choice, isn’t it?’”

A Final Ode to Paul Walker

A Final Ode to Paul Walker

It feels like I lost my exboyfriend. Actually, it’s the social equivalent of a one-night stand where I don’t remember the guy’s name — nor he mine — but, you know, we shared something. Paul Walker was my adult crush. Continuing my long-standing practice of penning Open Letters to strangers, here’s one for my Paulie. Dear Paul Walker – [...]

I Füçkèd Your Country: 2014 Capital Fringe Festival

I Füçkèd Your Country: 2014 Capital Fringe Festival

I was a 22-year-old American virgin living in the UK when I had sex for the first time. Having grown up Evangelical Christian in rural Mississippi and Illinois, I was totally unprepared. All I knew was that I was not supposed to have sex until I got married. Yet, here I was: Single. In England. Ready to fuck a really pale white guy with an awesome, sexy accent. I had no clue what I was doing.

Hi, I'm Your First Black Girlfriend

Hi, I’m Your First Black Girlfriend

Life is full of first-time experiences. The other week, a [black female] friend mentioned she hadn’t ever seen a white guy’s penis. Having seen more than one, I had the pleasure of showing her the most easily accessible one: my Mac’s desktop picture [NSFW]. Her response? “Awww, cute! It’s pink.” I love Akilah’s “Meet Your [...]

Enjoy a Rich Life: Happiness is Free

Enjoy a Rich Life: Happiness is Free

I grew up poor in a small town in rural Illinois. Nevertheless, my single mom raised us to believe we deserved to experience life richly. Happiness is free. As an adult with access to an admittedly wider array of options than those afforded me during childhood, I’ve lived in London, Amsterdam, New York City, Los Angeles, [...]

How to Talk to Your 5-Year-Old Kid About Sex

How to Talk to Your 5-Year-Old Kid About Sex

I don’t think any sane, healthy adult wants to teach a 5 year old how to give blowjobs. Don’t be frightened by the growing sex ed programs available in kindergarten. Here’s what’s up … plus my tips for having a healthy, age-appropriate discussion about sex.

Celebrity Sex, Vampires & Paternity Rights for Fathers

Celebrity Sex, Vampires & Paternity Rights for Fathers

If a man knocks up his on-again-off-again girlfriend via vitro fertilization, is he the kid’s father? The original pop culture vampire, Jason Patric, has something to say about that, but why should you listen to him? Listen to Morning Amp clip about paternity rights for fathers and celebrity influence on the discourse.

Touching Strangers: New York Photog Richard Rinaldi

Touching Strangers: New York Photog Richard Rinaldi

“He shows us humanity as it could be, as most of us wish it would be, and … as it was, as least for this one fleeting moment in time.” Steve Hartman

What Does It Mean If You Hate Sex?

What Does It Mean If You Hate Sex?

Lovers, if you live in ‪New York City, ‎Philadelphia‬ or ‪‎Boston‬, you can grab a copy of my column from newsstands, nearby subways, and everywhere else ink and paper hang out. Metro Newspaper is a daily printed in 15 languages in 19 countries sprinkled throughout Asia, Europe, North America, and South America, reaching 17 million [...]

How Your Beautiful, Bloody Heart Works

How Your Beautiful, Bloody Heart Works

Image above appears on I Fucking Love Science, curated by the “Canada-based self-made social media celebrity” Elise Andrew. Love her. Via Facebook, she has arguably done more to keep science in the public’s view than academic journals on the topic. And, in case you were wondering how the heart works, there’s a video for that. [...]

David Beckham Makes Love to Self in Mirror

David Beckham Makes Love to Self in Mirror

Love this. Via Buzzfeed: “Look at him. Look at him try to seduce himself in the mirror.”

Guess Who's on the Mattress?

Guess Who’s on the Mattress?

If you live in New York, Philadelphia or Boston, you can catch my sex column every other Thursday in Metro newspaper. Read me in newsprint in those cities or online everywhere else. Last week … Since the landmark U.S. Supreme Court Loving vs. Virginia decision declared laws barring such couplings unconstitutional, Americans have increasingly shared [...]

Real Dolls: A Free Movie and Photography Series

Real Dolls: A Free Movie and Photography Series

Hat tip to Buzzfeed for the heads up about such an interesting photography series. If you like that inside glimpse of the real doll factory, catch the plastic lovers on display at the MARTÍN GUTIERREZ: MARTIN(E) exhibition at Ryan Lee Gallery (527 WEST 26TH STREET, NY 10001). Want even more? Catch a short, fascinating (and [...]

A Reminder, Not Everyone Is An Asshole

A Reminder, Not Everyone Is An Asshole

Sometimes, kids remind adults about shit they should already know.

Sex, Love & A Crayon Box of Penises and Vaginas

Sex, Love & A Crayon Box of Penises and Vaginas

Description: Is it okay to be against interracial relationships, or should you be getting it on with penises and vaginas of all shades? Twanna A. Hines joins Vocalo’s Morning Amp hosted by BFFs forever Brian Babylon and Molly Adams, at Chicago Public Radio — home of This American Life, Wait Wait … Don’t Tell Me, and other original Chicago programming — to discuss American views on interracial relationships. [...]

Slutty, Pregnant, Christian & Teen

Slutty, Pregnant, Christian & Teen

USA! USA! USA! We’re number one!! You know those slutty, liberal countries that talk to kids about sex ALL. THE. TIME? Funny thing: Their teen mom / teen dad rate is lower than ours. Like, much lower. Here, it’s 2Xs higher than the U.K., 10Xs higher than Switzerland, and 3Xs higher than neighboring Canada, according to The [...]

Would You Date an Unattractive, Intelligent Person?

Would You Date an Unattractive, Intelligent Person?

“There’s too many interesting women I have not had the experience to know in this life because I have been brainwashed.” – Dustin Hoffman

Have Explosive Orgasms, Whether Partnered or Solo

Have Explosive Orgasms, Whether Partnered or Solo

I wish you bedroom fireworks and explosive orgasms this July 4th holiday weekend. Whether you’re single, hanging out with someone, partnered up, or enjoying a different arrangement, have fun! Remember: solo doesn’t mean sexless.

It's Okay to Have Sex on the First Date (Or Not)

It’s Okay to Have Sex on the First Date (Or Not)

I want to know if the guy is worth keeping around before I share with him the glorious wonder that is my delicious vagina.

Have Sex With Your Clothes On

Have Sex With Your Clothes On

Here’s one way to keep your clothes on while making sex even hotter: Have more adult conversations about what sexuality means to you personally and in our country. And be creative and fun while doing it!

The Other "F-Word" in Your Sex Life

The Other “F-Word” in Your Sex Life

“Don’t date, hook up with, or marry assholes. You’ll feel more alone than if you were single.” Lovers, my sex column is on newsstands in New York City, Philadelphia and Boston today. Find out about the F-Word in your sex life.

Are Sluts Too Distracting at Work? [VIDEO]

Are Sluts Too Distracting at Work? [VIDEO]

Sluts’ gravitational sexual pull is so strong that you won’t be able to do your job around them, especially if you’re interviewing a slut.

Financial Advice For Couples Living Together

Financial Advice For Couples Living Together

Get advice about blending the money pile, ranging from how to share the mortgage and whether or not you should have a joint banking account. Long story short: Share the financial risks equally.

14 Gay and Lesbian Romantic Comedies [LGBTQ]

14 Gay and Lesbian Romantic Comedies [LGBTQ]

Here’s a list of 14 gay and lesbian romantic comedies if boy-on-boy or girl-on-girl action turns you on and/or if you’re simply bored with predictable Girl Meets Boy movies about breeding couples.

Technology Makes Aging Sexy, Vintage

Technology Makes Aging Sexy, Vintage

You can thank technology for the recent uptick in “Then and “Now” media projects. Donald and Nancy wear matching outfits for 30+ years, complete with photos. There’s also a video of Jeremiah’s conversation with his 12-year-old self, 20th Anniversary Edition. And others. Since color photographs became more widely available in the 1940s and commercially mass marketed video equipment in the [...]

17 Romantic Comedies That Don't Suck

17 Romantic Comedies That Don’t Suck

Here’s a list of romantic comedies were the paring are interracial/interethnic, the guy doesn’t always get the girl, and the characters are more realistically flawed like the rest of us humans.

Free Date Idea: $150 Gift Certificate Up For Grabs!

Free Date Idea: $150 Gift Certificate Up For Grabs!

Successful interpersonal relationships are the key ingredient to a happier, healthier life. I really believe that. I’ve been writing about sex and relationships since 2005 because I want to connect people with good friends, families, coworkers, and lovers … and, when necessary, tell you how to get the fuck away from those people if they’re unhealthy or don’t [...]

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Culture

From food to design to film, find out how to see, create, and support art that brings pleasure to our lives.

Relationships

Learn healthy skills and hold all abusers accountable, in personal and professional relationships.

Sexual Health

You deserve an amazing sex life. Enjoy information about healthy and responsible sexuality.

Sex and Soccer

Keep gorgeous men, not racism, on pitches of the globe’s sexiest, most-watched sport.