Love is in the air. Elsewhere. I live in New York City where “air” is urine-scented steam rising from manholes. That said, I’ve decided to write about “love” and (separately) “marriage” today. Let’s talk about five future brides, shall we? I stumble across Essence magazine’s Will You Marry Me? contest. “We offered 5 men the chance to propose,” the mag explains. Vote. The most popular couple wins $50,000. The female contestants? Proper black girls. Straightened hair. Polished. Appropriate. All very beautiful. I’m rooting for this woman. Recently diagnosed with multiple sclerosis, she: genuinely looks cute and happy with her dude; wears excellent sexy summer dresses; makes funny faces at cameras; and gets freaky-deaky(?) in hot tubs. I love it! What’s more? When her boyfriend proposes, the chick gets so nervous she acts downright quirky. Nervously flipping through a magazine, she darts her eyes around the room then says: “Huh? What the?” Video: 02:44. That’s awesome!

I imagine I’d react the exact same — if I believed in getting wed. Nope, kiddies. It’s just not for me; I don’t see the point of marriage. Few would tolerate its failure rate elsewhere. Imagine 50% of MTA trains crashed during rush hour, 50% of planes fell from the sky or 50% of NYC taxicab drivers knifed their passengers. If any of this occurred, alarms would sound. Clearly, something isn’t working. Right? Not the case with marriage. “It works, dammit! IT WORKS!!! For everyone!!! You’ve just gotta believe in it hard enough.” The assumption? Divorce is failure; however, sleeping next to someone in the same bed without fucking them for months, hell, even YEARS at a time is “success.” Being an adult, walking away from an agreement that once worked very well but no longer fits either party, is “quitting.” Sticking together through the bitter end — and, I mean BITTER fights, namecalling, cheating, loneliness, family feuds, unwanted children, etc. — is “commitment.” Let’s not pretend all marriages are perfect, shall we?

Racialicious gives it to you straight, “plenty of black people - I’d say most - are really committed to the idea of two parents and a stable marriage.” Nuh-uh. Not me. :) Don’t get me wrong. I’m not ANTI marriage, mind you. (Ditto for gay marriage. Whoever wants to marry should be able to marry.) For some, it works. When proposing to the awesome contestant I mention earlier in this post, her guy says, “You once asked me if I could meet anyone, who would it be. The answer is, and always will be, our children.” See? Beautiful. That’s love. I sincerely wish them the best in marriage. For me, for now, I’m okay being single and childfree. How about you? I check the demographic stats on my blog. Interestingly, most of you (54%) are men. Sexy white folks, gorgeous black people, Asian hotties and other lovely readers like getting down with the funky brown. Married, single and divorced people read this site. This blog is most interesting when people respectively disagree; so, tell me your answer to this question: Marriage. Is it worth it?

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Credit paid: Image pf hands is by Kostya Kisleyko.

Technorati Tags: divorce, ESSENCE magazine, funky brown chick, funkybrownchick, gay marriage, Hines, marriage, Twanna, Will You Marry Me?

Technorati Tags: Chris Noth, dating, dating blogs, dating stories, ESSENCE magazine, funky brown chick, funkybrownchick, GABRIEL AUBRY, interracial, Negroshire, Peggy Brunache, relationships, Robin Thicke, sex, Twanna, Twanna A. Hines, Twanna Hines, white guys who date black girls

UPDATE: Ooooh! Be sure to read New York Times article, “Sex and the Rest of the City — Different Shoe Budget, Same Love Troubles.”
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Sex and the City (the movie) opens in Manhattan tonight. And, yeah, hell, I’ll admit it: I’m going to see it with my girls. Who’s in for tonight? Andy Milonakis‘ sister (inside joke: she doesn’t have a first name), my long-term friend April, a few women from my Beautiful Brown Girls Brunch Club (Ify, Rochelle, Suja, Chinyelu and Angie) as well as a new friend of a friend named Sara Rosen. Quite a diverse group of chicks with their own unique brand of sexy. We’re gonna have dinner, wine and cocktails at my favorite French restaurant. After that, we’ll see the movie, swing by the Feministing anniversary party and then go out dancing. Tavaris — an old university friend from BGSA (the black graduate student association) — is in town. The girls’ night out might meet up with the boys’ night out. Looking forward to hanging out with friends & seeing the movie. Our group is poorer, browner and more down to earth. What’s on the screen isn’t our lives; it’s just entertainment. Pure and simple.

I’m backed up on email. NYC friends, text me or (DM me on Twitter) if you wanna meet up tonight. Everyone else, you already know how to follow along with the live, play-by-play action: Twitter.

I already know quite a few of you aren’t SATC fans. Wondering: Is anyone else going to see the movie tonight or are you all skipping out on the madness?

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Related links:

• Sex and the Rest of the City.”
• ABC NEWS: The Sex (and the City) Economy
• Funky and Free: Sex in the Real World
• Jennifer Hudson, Sarah Jessica Parker and Sex and the City writer/director Michael Patrick King share (with ESSENCE magazine) the importance of including a Black woman in the film
• What the hell is Twitter?!

Technorati Tags: ESSENCE magazine, funky brown chick, funkybrownchick, Jennifer Hudson, movie, SATC, Sex and the City, Twanna